I am just getting out of an emotionally abusive relationship and think I'm finally ready to move on. I have come to terms with many things, such as him never changing or wanting to, having a drinking problem (this is my opionion and people who have seen him out agree), and a host of other things. Deep down I know I still love him and I don't completely blame him because I believe he is a good person through and through, but I keep putting my happiness on hold, hoping he will change. He left me a year ago and has toyed with me ever since, stating he wants to be with me (but I can tell he's waiting for me to commit to some terms of his). I need to move on! How do I meet a decent man already who I won't compare to him?
Meeting guys: easy. Get out, move around, be friendly, make friends. They'll come.
Not comparing them to your old boyfriend: depends, on how disciplined you are. Everybody brings into their relationships some good, some crap, and some real dealbreakers. You can either measure your new men against your old men, or you can take the good you find, with the crap you can deal with, and throw the dealbreakers overboard.
I picked up a hobby I was in an abusive relationship as well and took a lot of time for myself after I started to dance. but I met a new group of friends and do an activity that is a huge part of who I am today. I then started meeting people I have met great guys and not so great guys. I have met some on internet dating site just do it safely if you decide. There is a free site that I use now and it is fun to just start seeing what is out there. I have had friends set me up and I meet them out. It does take time and that is what you have to figure is what do you want in a relationship what kind of guy do you want. I finally figured it out but now it is easier to weed out what I don't want. Hope this helps :)
It does :) TY :) I tried internet dating...it didn't really get me anywhere lol. And the bar scene? Forget it. Oh well. Maybe a good one will come around next time I'm in Barnes and Noble or Starbucks lol. - 3 months ago
Well, that will take time especially since your guard will be up. I think that any realtionship you get into you will fined yourself comparing at first. After a while you will stop. I was in an abusive relationship for 6 years and finally got the guts to leave him. The biggest thing I can tell you is take your time with guys you date and please don't be in a rush to meet a guy. He will come along. For the most part I would focus on you and enjoy your life.
Thank you :) It's awful because it's like I wanna meet someone to rekindle what I had with my ex...what was once the best feeling in the world, ya know? I hate this crap. - 3 months ago
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