I met this girl before college. It seemed like we really hit it off together and we hang out (she comes to my dorm) a few nights a week. We just sit around talking and she has a lot of energy and I sort of feed off it. We walk around holding hands and we cuddle on my bed and we kiss when we meet and we kiss when I take her back to her dorm (keep in mind this same routine has happened over 10 times at least).
We've had a talk twice about how we feel about each other to make sure we were on the same page. She says we are friends and that she doesn't "like" me. However, she has said multiple times that she would like to make out with me, and I really would like to make out with her just to see if things do spark when we do it.
The problem lies herein... It feels to me that we are becoming too good of friends, not great friends, but the problem is I am hesitant to make a move on her but I know she will go with it if I just kiss her, but the problem is I don't want to kiss her to make out out of the blue...I'm stumped...I don't know how to go about actually making out with her. Basically, I don't know what to do because I do feel like we are friends. She's a really cool, smart, attractive, and energetic girl.
I have hung out with her all the time solely because we have fun, but each time I want to hang out, in the back of my mind I think about making my move on her and I don't know what to do in this situation.
Well honey, sorry to say, but if she has told you more than once that you are just friends, then that is what I would take it as. You seem to like her and unless she throws out other signs, I wouldn't put too much effort into it. Sometimes it takes you ignoring her for her to figure out if something else is there. Most girls are pretty forthcoming with how they feel. Again, I said most not all.
It sucks to have your emotions messed with. And if you get to close to her knowing that she doesn't like you like that, you will get disappointed. If anything, maybe you should play hard to get. and when she wants to come to your dorm one night, say you made plans..It makes you more desirable. And that might be needed at this point. it will make her step back and examine her feelings because if she gets sad that she won't get to do the normal routine, that's a sign there's more there then just friends for her. Good luck!!
You've just gotta suck it up, take a deep breath, summon your courage, etc. - and GO FOR IT! Make a strong move and see how she responds. Look at her facial expressions. Pause and let her pick up from where you stopped, you know? If she's feeling chemistry beyond friendship, she'll grab you and take things to another level. If she's not, then she'll look kind of bored or even push you away. Then you know you need to move on.
If she does push you away or shows other signs where she's still not interested, play it cool. Be like, "well, I had to give it a shot" and make a few jokes so that you two aren't uncomfortable and can still be friends. Good luck!
Hmm that's tough She knows how you feel. So you can't tell her any more than that. She's told you she wants to make out, and you're into it, so try it and see where it goes. Just be wary to stop if she only wants to kiss you and nothing more. You might have to settle for the fact that this may not be the girl for you, no matter how attractive and awesome she is, if she only wants you as a side salad, you might have to walk away.
Haha yeh I know hey. Well, it is true, no one wants to be a side salad, normal people would prefer to be the main and only course. but I have to admit, that term cracks me up too. - 9 months ago
Well if you really want to know if she wants something more then one night when she comes over to hang out like she normally does have the dorm room all romantically set up!! Candles romantic music and dinner the whole works right!! She is going to know that you are trying to get with her and if she likes you and wants you for more than just a friend she won't say a thing about all that she will just tell you how much she loves it and ask the occasion!! If not then oh well you didn't waste your time you still get a romantic night right!!
Next time when you go to give her a kiss open your mouth a little more than usual and just transform your kiss into a French kiss. Or just keep kissing her slowly. Show her you can kiss very well. Maybe it will spark something.
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Describe your ideal first date; Where do you go? What do you wear? How does the date end?
I would pick her up from her apartment/house or other dwelling then I'd we would go to a nice restaurant for dinner maybe candle lit and then maybe a movie, or some stargazing or just plain old goofing around
Afterwards..what will your date know about you?
My sense of humor, who I am, what kinda person I am, whether or not she might go out again, what I think of her, the weather, my job and education.
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(Age:36 to 45)
When: 9 months ago
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