There's this girl who I'm interested in. We live in the same neighborhood. I noticed her about a year ago & we meet often but I usually ignore her because of hesitation . I'm not sure whether she is interested-when we meet, she looks at me for like 2 secs and looks away. If near me, she shakes keys or a coin and runs her fingers through her hair but has never talked to me. I've tried to show my interest by looking directly into her eyes when we meet and trying to smile(am one of those serious-faced people). After we've met, I find myself cursing myself for not taking initiative, so nowadays I just avoid her completely. I wonder if I still stand a chance with her because I think that if I say hi, she might ignore me or will have moved on then. I need advice on techniques I can use to get her.
Update: I saw her the other day wit some other guy. She looked at me then looked at him, directing her to another way. Is she just trying to make me jealous or is just not interested?
9 months ago
I am 'that girl'! I cannot make eye contact with a guy that I'm interested in if I don't know whether or not he is interested in me! My heart sinks into my toes and I can't say a word. (It's sad...really.) I'm 25 years old and I have no 'game'!
I'm old fashioned...the guy is the persuer. If you're not confident in your ability to say what you want to face to face, then write her a letter. Don't beat around he bush or leave room for miscommunication either. Say, "I think you're adorable...I want to take you out on a date next weekend. Call me to let me know what day is best for you. #123-456-7890"
It sounds like she's into you. And, if she's not...then you lost nothing and now you won't have to wonder anymore.
I'm acting exactly the same as the girl in your situation. I don't know if he's interested so I try to avoid eye contact and etc. I don't know want to be a fool in case he actually doesn't like me. We have been playing this mind game for 3 years ( pathetic, right?). But recently, he has opened himself and showed me obvious signs that he likes me. So I opened myself too, I'm acting bolder around him. We hold eye contact for a long time. We flirted. You should really be more active, be brave, if you're acting unsure of your feelings, she will be disappointed and avoid you like I do. Do it before it's too late and she will move on!
3 yrs?....no, no, it's not pathetic...everyone has their process......actually, we've alredy started avoiding each other. it's as if we have an unwritten 'timetable'. this doesn't seem like it's gonna get anywhere, is it? - 6 months ago
Answerer
This's gonna get somewhere if you determine to make a clear move. Smile, flirt with her. The first times she may be shocked to see you change ur behavior. She may look away ( especially if she's a shy/nervous girl). But after some times like those, she may look back at you and smile back. Be patient, and don't be easily let down. Let ur hope sore. Romance means vulnerability. We must open ourselves and accept the chance of rejection before we get what we want. - 6 months ago
i think this is a situation where neither one of you are sure of the other's feelings.i think you should write her a letter and let her know how you feel if just walking up to her is to intimidating for you.do what ever you have to do to let her kno your feelings because just ignoring her will give her the feeling that you want nothing to do with her.
i don't think that she knows that you like her. if you want her to notice you, you have to make contact with her somehow, even if it's just a held eye contact. talk to her, ask her to go somewhere. if you want her to know that you like her DON'T ignore her. this along with game-playing are my 2 pet hates in the relationship world.
I don't think she really knows that you like her. what I think you should do is next time you see her go up to her and talk to her. ask her how her day is going, and if there is anything exciting or interesting happening in town. That should be the door opener to invite her to go with you. also you can ask her to go to have a drink with you, either at starbucks or at a javajuice or even a bar (I doin't know your age, sorry ) but if you just smile and look at her without really talking she just might think you're some typical guy that thinks she's cute and that's it. Show her how you are different, ask her what the last movie she saw was or just tell her, "hey I just saw (insert movie here) and it was incredible! (mention why you think its awesome, etc, what you liked about the movie what you didn't) and go from there. see how that goes and let me know! JeN
Its really hard to tell whether or not she's into you by the little information here. She may but I'm not totally sure. If you want to drive her crazy and make her think about you all day, hold eye contact for a few seconds too long once or twice and then ignore her for the rest of the day. Its evil and its going to drive her crazy but she will be wondering whether you like her or not all day long. And then eventually she may start to like you if she doesn't already because girls will always try to like the guy back if they think he is into her whether they like it or not. Play a little hard to get at first if you are not sure if she's into you. Trust me, it WILL drive her crazy and she's going to keep wondering whether or not you are into her. Hold eye contact some days, ignore her others, flirt with her sometimes but not every day. Smile at her once in a while. Get her wondering whether or not you like her. If she seems to be losing interest, go after her, be straightforward, and ask her out. The whole goal of playing hard to get is to get her into you and if she is actually or seems to be LOSING interest, stop playing games and ask her out.
I agree wit you but she avoids eye contact. When we meet, she looks sideways or down mostly, maintaining the same facial expression as b4. Now what? - 9 months ago
Answerer
She probably likes you but is not sure that you like her back because you have been ignoring her and so she's not going to show interest because she doesn't want to look like a fool. Basically she thinks you are uninterested and so she doesn't want to show interest.
If you are trying to hold eye contact and she won't look back at you it's either because she's shy or because she just is not into you. She's probably just shy if she looks down but looking to the side is a sign of disinterest. - 9 months ago
Answerer
Try showing more obvious interest in her and if she still does not respond in a few days move on because she's not into you. If she will not make and hold eye contact with you when you try to catch her eye, especially if she looks to the side, she's not interested. No matter how shy she may be, she will still at least attempt to make eye contact with you if she's interested especially if you try to initiate it. Even shy girls will at least try to show some form of interest - 9 months ago
Answerer
About your update, it could go either way. She could be trying to make you jealous or she could just think that you are into her and not like you back. The only way to know for sure is to ask but if this guy is her boyfriend, then its best to leave her alone till she's single. - 9 months ago
this is the exacttttt thing I'm going through with a guy. me and this guy had a drunk hookup, but he's the kind of guy that doesn't hookup with just any random girl that he doesn't have potential feelings for, drunk or not. and we haven't talked since.. mostly because I don't want to take the initiative and he's too shy to as well. i show the same signs as the girl you're talking about. I don't even talk to him, or look at him or show any signs I like him, and he acts how you're acting. I wishhh he would just say something to me, but I feel like he may be feeling the way you're feeling. seriously, just talk to her. I'm sure she's waiting for it, whether she's showing signs of it or not. you'll be relieved, trust me.
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