Ok there's this Japanese girl I met in Japanese class. She was born and raised in japan so customs are different. I know there is a cultural difference but she tells me when I did something that makes her uncomfortable. And so far she hasn't said anything. She loves talking to me, but she never calls me to talk. What's strange is that if I call her she will answer and we'll talk for hours even if she's busy. if we both have time she spends like 10 hours with me talking. She comes over and I have a lot of stuff to occupy her time. Tv, computer, games, just a lot of stuff. She doesn't do anything with them, she sits there and talks to me about everything from personal stuff to funny stuff. also when we hang out she doesn't mind touching me or getting close. Like this one time she was helping me with Japanese words and we were sitting on the floor. So she got up and sat right in front of me facing away from me and was almost sitting on my lap. I thought she didn't know how close she was sitting. Still she was close enough to put my arms around her. I didn't but you get what I'm saying. But after like 5 or 10 minutes of sitting there she leaned forward and stayed that way. To me that meant she didn't wanna be touched but she acted like she did at first. See my problem yet? another time we were tickling each other on my bed. Then I got up and was standing next to the bed so she put her knee's on each side of my hip and used me like a foot stool and laid down. Again after a little time she changed positions on my bed then eventually got up. it's like she catches herself and then corrects it. Like she's touching my hair, arms, sits close to me, and then she turns her body away from me and can't look at me when she talks but doesn't stop talking or says she has to go. She even continues to touch my arms, sides, tickles me and she lets me touch her.
Side note: she told me she doesn't feel like she deserves to be loved in this one serious conversation we had.
Why is she give me negative and positive body language?
Sounds like she's interested, but is not sure you are. I've definitely flirted and then gone kinda cold in the past. If the you aren't flirting back she's going to keep putting her behavior in check. So, if you are interested flirt back and see what happens. that said, I spent last year in japan on exchange and have travelled there two other times, so maybe I can make some generalizations about dating in japan (though depending on how much of her growing up this girl did in japan, or how much she has travelled, this might not apply). It seems like gender roles are a somewhat more traditional (girls don't ask guys out and probably don't make the first move either most of the time) in japan, and dating itself is a bit more formal (generally people express their feeling before dating and date before doing anything physical). Still, I don't know how much effect that has on her. I am instantly curious why she thinks she doesn't deserve to be loved. Did you ask her about it? Did she explain at all? Depending on whether its something she's willing to talk openly about, you might want to go back to that conversation. Maybe it will even give you the opportunity to tell her you're interested. Give it some more time if you want, but I think you should eventually ask if she's interested in going out with you instead of just coming over to visit!
That conversation also lead to her saying that I shouldn't fall for her. What's strange about that is she's really good with English and could have said I don't like you that way but she didn't and she still tickling me & such. Also we didn't get the why. - 11 months ago
Answerer
I still say you might want to go back to that conversation if she's okay with it. She is acting interested, but it looks like you need to work out what's going on psychologically. is she leaving? Could she be worried you'll both get hurt? - 11 months ago
Question Asker
She's gonna graduate in about a year and I don't think she's gonna stay in a small town like this. She's here for college. It's complicated but I just don't understand why be like don't fall for me and yet she's closer now more then ever. - 11 months ago
Answerer
I can't say its that for sure, but I feel like there is definitely a possibility that that is why she might have said it. Really you need to get back into a conversation (serious or half-joking) and get her to talk to you more about this. - 11 months ago
Answerer
Also, sort of agree with what superstrength said about her being worried about being hurt. - 11 months ago
She likes you and she's also horny. I can be all about a guy and I never call him. I never call any guys. Put the moves on her or try to move the relationship along. She digs you. Don't be shy!
Hi! This is the married girl with the guy friend issue. Btw, he knows I'm married. He's been to my house and he and my hubby have talked to each other. Anyways, thanks for the reply. Your situation is interesting. It sounds like this girl really likes you. If I didn't like a guy I wouldn't be as physical. But you're teenagers, right? Girls act a little differently at that age. If I hung out in a guy's room now, it would definitely only be because I am going to, you know what. You're right about the cultural differences, but I think emotions and love are pretty universal. I don't understand though why she said she doesn't feel like she deserves to be loved. Do you know anything about her family life? I was head over heels in love with a guy a few years ago. It was a similar situation. He didn't call me much but when I called him we would talk for hours. Obviously, the relationship ended and when I questioned why he broke up with me, he said it was because I was insecure. I tell all of my girl friends (and some of my guy friends) that confidence is everything. I'm not the ideal weight (which as I'm sure you know is an issue for most women) and yet I am very confident and literally attract swarms of people. There's rarely a minute during the day that I'm alone. I hardly ever call people. They always seek me out. I think that my confidence is very attractive to my guy friend, who is absolutely gorgeous. If you saw us together, you'd wonder. Physically, we don't fit but he's always around. All that to say, show her you're confident, even if you have to fake it. And you need to start asking her some questions. But be subtle. She might be shy. I have always been afraid to call guys I liked. I don't know a lot about the Japanese, but one thing I know is that they're usually very private. She might have been taught by her parents that calling guys is too forward. Heck, our culture teaches us the same thing. Overall, I think she's into you, but I'm concerned about why she thinks she's not worthy of love. You want to watch out for girls like that. Take it from me. Low self-esteem can be a relationship killer. Because you like her so much now, you only see all of her cuteness. Down the line, if things get serious and she still has no confidence, it will definitely get on your nerves. Trust me, I've been through a lot of relationships. Hope this helps.
Ok were actually in our mid 20's. lol Also We both have the same issue. She likes both being alone and hanging with friends. The love issue is past related and I've told her she deserves love. She says I shouldn't fall for her, but she acts like she does. - 11 months ago
I say go in "for the kill". She's touching you and letting you touch her. Just let her know that she deserves to be loved, and that you are the guy that's going to do it. Make sure you are interested in more than a hookup though, she sounds like she might have been hurt before or is afraid of being hurt.
Also, she probably never calls you because she is afraid to admit to herself that she wants a relationship.
I have a interesting question.How reading a persons' body language be taken serious?One thing can mean more than 1-thingIf that's the case than aren't...
So I ended a bad relationship about 6 months ago, caught my Girlfriend snorting her adderall with cocaine, I asked her to stop she decide to continue...
Body Language Secret #1There is an obvious height disadvantage (or advantage depending on your point of view) that women have. Women, on average, are about 5.5 inches shorter than men. These...
Site Links
About GirlsAskGuys
GirlsAskGuys Widgets
Help Us Improve!
