Yeah so I live with a few people. A few months ago this guy moves in. I thought he was horribly attractive and as the months passed I found myself in a full-blown crush. It's quite lustful but I really do like him. We're quite a bit alike.
Anyway. Should I wait until I move out (which will be soon, for unrelated reasons) to ask him to a movie or the malt shop or something? And is there some weird alternative set of regulations for these things?
Thanks in advance.
Update: Tomorrow's moving day!
Oi... I fear rejection.
5 months ago
Update: I called him out of (not-so) pure platonic intentions. The conversation was brief when he called me back the next day. I don't know if he was nervous or something? The call ended with him saying "Well I just wanted to see how you were doing. I'm gonna go. "
5 months ago
Update: Hmm... He called again saying he'd gotten my message. I had left it on Saturday and he had called on Sunday. Today is Thursday. He said it went thru today and his cell phone is terrible. (He doesn't have a landline.) So yay? I guess!
5 months ago
From the way this guy is behaving, sounds like you did the right thing by waiting until moving out before making an approach. Now that you have moved out, there is probably not much to lose by making one more attempt -- maybe something casual like getting together for coffee or lunch. Or, if you don't want to risk rejection (which sounds quite possible), maybe you can use a back channel to find out what this guy is thinking or saying about you, by asking one of your ex-roommates to talk to him and report back to you privately? Good luck!
What constitutes an attempt? That call was the last time I spoke to him. So does a message count as an attempt? I don't know. - 5 months ago
Answerer
Sure, a message would count as an attempt. But if I were you, I think my next move would be to gather some information via the back channel, through one of your friends who is still living with this guy. Have them try to find out what this guy thinks of you, and then report back to you. Armed with that information, you can decide what, if anything, to do next. Good luck! - 5 months ago
So are you offering to help him move out? Are you going to ask for his new number and address tomorrow? There should be some good opportunities tomorrow to make it clear to this guy, in a non-threatening way, that you'd like to get together with him after he moves out. His response should tell you a lot, right then and there. Good luck!!
Yes, wait till you move out. That's only fair to your other roommates -- it might get uncomfortable for them otherwise. Let me add that this would be a much harder question if you weren't moving out soon. But you are, so it's easy. Best of luck!
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