If a guy agreed to marry me without having sex at all according to my request only ,do I have to believe him or not.!?I am really confused . I am a virgin and he knows that .
Thats a confusing question. You mean he's not allowed to have had sex? If not you don't have to believe him.
If it's that you're not going to have sex together till you're married, why not believe it really makes no difference.
But honestly sexual satisfaction is very important. If you go into marriage blind like that and end up not being able to satisfy each other, it'll likely end in divorce.
And if you're saying that he's gonna marry you and you're still not gonna give him any, that's just pure insanity. NO MAN will marry a woman if he's not going to get sex. Unless of course he's gay and you're just his cover. lol You cannot stay married and never have sex. So if that's the case don't believe it, because if you're some guys wife he's GOING to f*** you.
Well I am scared that he is gonna rape me but he agreed even to sign papers in the presence of witnesses that he would not have sex with me.I mean if he does it he would be offender and go to gail.So still you believe he lies to me.*confused*.Now He rarely talks about sex or sleeping with me .However,Before he used to talk about those subjects alot. - 23 days ago
Answerer
Like I said, if you marry a guy he's GOING to have sex with you. If you marry him he's going to eventually either try to convince you to do it or force you. If you don't want sex, don't get married... EVER. Seriously. Sex is a corner-stone in such relationships. And I don't care if he said he'd sign some sort of contract with a witness. Because marriage is a contract too. "To have and to hold" that means sex and love. It's part of a verbal contract. No jury in the world would convict him for it. - 22 days ago
Question Asker
So how about if we just lived together without marriage and with the contract of not having sex.I know after living for more than 5 years they would become officially accepted as real couples.But I wanna live with him less than 5 years. - 20 days ago
Hey.You can believe him. A person who respects you and your body should be really someone good. If he had wanted only fun, either he could have manipulated you or could have gone to strip clubs. Its more for you to decide, if you hang out with him you should hav known by now, what his intentions are. you can easily tell out if a guy is looking for love or sex.
Sorry we haven t seen each other yet because of the distance between.I have to add that yea he goes to strip clubs and I am not sure till yet he has manipulated me or non.How can I know when I am not there to see everything !!!!.Please tell me how can I find out he wants me for his sex or love.Show me a way.thank you : ) - 2 months ago
Answerer
Just spend time with him for sometime..Get to meet him. Tell him that you are not yet ready for a decision but would decide upon due course. Say that this is just a friendship and that he cannot go beyond boundaries. If he is a genuine guy, he would be within his boundaries and would respect you a lot and shower his love. But if he is just for sex, he would try to play with you physically. You can easily find it out within just two or three meetings. Girls are intelligent and I got to accept it - 2 months ago
Question Asker
Wow thank you : ).Ok I would try to meet him face to face but I know it is gonna be long way as I am busy *university student*and do not have enough money to go 7 timezones farther and see him and he is in the same situation with me but uneducated lol. - 2 months ago
Well if you want male friends I guess your best bet is a gay male--I know a gay girl that lives with a gay guy--so maybe some thing like that will help--sex and eating veggies is a stretch I think most people who eat veggies well it has to do with not killing the animal not the taste of meat--but you don't like any sex---kissing--oral--vaginal--right-- I mean people who eat veggies they do eat--but you do not want anything with sex--- it is not very normal--not to want to hug and kiss even! That nice close feeling of warm arms around you? unless you are austic? Well I wish you luck and hope your life is good and turn out well---- so maybe forget about marriage and very close friends with straight guys----cause I think if you are dating a guy --sex will be an issue ---unless he is gay! well best of luck
No I don t refuse kissing or huge.especially huge that I like it. : ) but yea maybe finding a gay male must be mine last solution but I wanna try to find other guys before .ty for advice : ) - 2 months ago
i think you need to see a dr--sex can hurt a lot --for many reasons--but you are young-it hurt a lot for me! and I had some issuses to--i hope you can find a guy you like and want to kiss---why do you think you are so ugly? Anyway please talk to an obgyn--they can help find out if you have problem that makes sex hurt--maybe hyponois or anything thing to make you calm and relaxed--but only be with a guy you care about---good luck
Ty for your advice but if I don t like sex is not because it hurts and its just because I don't like it.For example we can not blame vegetarians that why they don t eat meat or we can not force homosexual people to marry with opposite sex because then they will face problems maybe Dr can solve the situation temporarely only but again in long time they will face problems.So I think like a homosexual or vegetarian person I am born with disliking sex.lol - 2 months ago
Question Asker
I think I won t be able to make any friend from opposite sex because finally they would want me to have sex one day and I would broke up with all of them because of that only:(.but ok no matter life goes on and is beautiful even without having any friend of opposite sex hehe. - 2 months ago
If you ask him to wait until you are married and he loves you he could wait--of course he may rush to ge married--if you ask him to never have sex with you ( even after marriage) this would be trouble---you would need to see a therapist----or he would have to have sex some where else---please clarify your question
I don t like sex at all even with the person who can I die for. I need to be this way if I wanna live happy as I am now.:)).So this is my way of life and I see he tries to change my view toward sex but I don t think he would be successful because I like remaining virgin and I don t have a plan to have a baby in future.I wanna adapt a baby if he really wants.So I don t know what's wrong with me or him and should I trust him or not .I mean I am afraid of getting married tough I promised him before. - 2 months ago
That's a very difficult request for a guy to make or keep. Are you saying that you are asking him to not expect sex from you during your entire marriage? If that's the case then you better make sure he has some sexual problem or hang-ups of his own where he'd not want sex. Also, will you guys be doing all the other sexual things (foreplay) instead so that both of you or at least him gets some sexual satisfaction? If the answer is no then I'd say no matter what he promises you before marriage he'll probaby eventually break them. sooner or later. Let's face it, couples make a vow at marriage to live together till death to them parts, etc, and yet 50% of marriages end up in divorece. Don't expect anything better than that or you'll be greatly disappointed. .
Hehe.I think both of us and mostly me have some sexual problems if you say that's a problem as I don t wanna have sex or foreplay after marriage at all.However,I see tough he accepted to not want sex from me,still he some times specially recently all talks about being with me in bed or some other sexual things. :(.So I have started to lose my trust toward him as I see those signs.I want to marry him as I love him but on the other hand I am really afraid of living with him in one place in future. - 2 months ago
Answerer
If you're afraid of living with him in one place because of trust or that he'll eventually resent not be able to have sex with you then you probably should be thinking pretty serously of getting out of the relationship you're in right now and think more of just a mutal friendship kind of thing. That way you'll be able to pursue another guy that's more into your way of thinking. - 2 months ago
Question Asker
Hummm.u are right but when he was just a friend of mine all was good .after we talked about marriage he started to change so I am afraid if I found another guy that can think just like me but when it comes to marriage.....again same situation.damn sex lol. I had been friends with many boys but all they want at marriage was sex and I could not find a boy who agrees to live with a girl without wanting it.Even haven t heard of that till now hehe, - 2 months ago
Answerer
Just keep your eyes open for the right guy. They say there's guy for every girl so just keep looking and maybe someday some guy might come along you really and wanna marry you and say.. I hope you still don't wanna have sex. :-) - 2 months ago
Question Asker
Hehe ty I am sure that I am gonna find him and he is just somewhere there in the world that I can t see.lol :) I think he is hidding himself from me because he thinks he is rare or being that way is sickness but in fact its not .If you look at homosexuality case tough I am not ,it had the same feature with my case when all people had bad idea about that in past .again ty for ur responses :) - 2 months ago
I am not sure he is completely happy because that was not his desire and this was only me who gave the idea of having not sex at all after marriage.Still I can see he has some sex desires for me.So what can I do to be sure that he is going to do exactly what I want after we lived in same place. - 2 months ago
Answerer
Sit down with him, find out what you both are prepared to be happy with, and see if you can live with it. Remember that if he's unhappy with your sex life, he'll either abandon it (which is bad) or resent it (which is worse), so you want to get this right. - 2 months ago
Question Asker
Yea ty for ur advice.I know it and always I try to talk most about plans that I have if we are gonna live together and what we are gonna do.However,I see recently he use to talk more about sex and some other stuff.I am really confused that if he really accepted what I want then why he is talking that way.He is very strong than me physically and I am afraid of living with him in future at same house as I see his acts are changing toward me. - 2 months ago
What Girls Said
N/A
(Age:30 to 35)
When: 2 months ago
Its your choice wether to believe him or not, and NO you don't have to.
What bothers me is, your thinking about marrying someone you can't believe, that should be a BIG hint, don't ya think?
and honestly what the hell are you confused over? wether or not you have good judgment?
From the first time I met him I trusted him as all people say you have to believe your best friends and trust them.but the thing that confuses me is that I am scared to marry him as I see he is going to do what I don t want.thats sex.He use to sarcastic talks all the time and talk exactly opposite side of me intentionally and when I blame him why he does that often the only thing that he says is that all Americans like the sarcasm with their best friends.So I am confused when he says the truth :( - 2 months ago
Answerer
Personally after reading everything here, I think there is something maybe wrong with you, not trying to be mean, but why do you hate sex so much? were you molested? I think you should talk to a professional. You say you hate sex, yet you've never had it??? Wierd/Mental, who knows. - 2 months ago
Question Asker
Yea you are not first person who says me weird lol.My boyfriend also says that.First he thought I must be insane to think like that but now he sees I am totally sane person as he told me last time.I know it seems very odd to you but this is my way of life and no body could change this even my boyfriend at least till now. - 2 months ago
Answerer
Well, good luck to you, and don't knock something until you try it, you just might like it! - 2 months ago
ok if he agreed to not have sex with you at your request give him a chance to prove to you that he will stand by his word but if he's pressuring you to have sex now or just making comments abt sexual things directed to you then that should be a sign that he isn't going to stand by his word. and when you get married and you are still a virgin it is a beautiful thing to share with your husband even if you are cared it might hurt really bad it is still a beautiful thing to share with one another .
Yea.ty I see what you mean to share but sharing in sex only is unpleasure for me not only it hurts really but because I don t like it and I am more happy without it.peoples have different views.some die for sex and some hate to have it lol.But the most thing that scares me more is that recently he started to change his way and he uses to talk about sex each time and I try to pay not attention to what he says but my question is how am I going to live with this person and trust him. - 2 months ago
First of all, a guy should not agree to marry you. He should ask you and he should be able to tell you what is so special about you that sets you aside from all other women. So, my answer in your case is NO, you should not believe him.
And if he asks you to marry him, he should have some plans for the future and some stability. Stay a virgin and definitely don't do it with this guy. Don't be confused, be smart. Innocent girls can be smart and innocent at the same time. Guys lie to get sex, that's the truth. The more you listen to them, the more they will lie to move you forward. Don't fall for it! Tell that loser to kickrocks!
(Age:18 to 24)
When: 2 months ago
