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brknheart7

Should I accept that he doesn't love me anymore or try to fight to get him back?

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brknheart7 (Age:25 to 29)     When: 4 months ago
Views: 131     Category: Break-Up
2 months ago my boyfriend, age 29 & I had a huge fight in a restaurant which ended the relationship. I regret because I know I over-reacted to the situation, I do take the blame, but I wasn't ready to let go of him yet. Dating for 2 years.

My dad had an on-going affair for 3 years & left my family 6 months, before my boyfriend & I broke up. So the whole issue of cheating was still fresh. My boyfriend was well informed of my situation since the beginning.

So he said outta the blue "Just to clear the slate, I cheated 2x, you know it was just something for fun". So I snapped & told him it was over. He laughed loudly after the comment about the cheating. Almost every sentence I used had a curse word. His joke triggered the same memory, when my dad confessed to my family about his affair. I couldn't stand to even look at my bf, I left him there & decided to take the bus home. He tried to call me on my cell, but I hung up on him. He saw me @ the bus stop & offered to drive me home. I took the ride, but continued to give him silent treatment because he kept making comments, that if I had wanted to brk up, I should have told him & not have to act in this manner. My anger kept rising that I ripped our pic that was in my wallet & threw his copy of the car keys onto his dashboard. Then he says" I'm a smart guy, that I stayed my distance away from your family & friends". That was a jab to my heart, I know he said that cause he was hurting too. We arrived home & I asked him if he wanted the leather jacket back, that he gave me for xmas. He was so pissed that he told me just to get out of the car.

The next day I tried to call him to apologize cause I realized it was all my fault. I know had no excuse to say those things or to hurt him the way I did. He ignored my calls. Around 8pm I tried calling him again knowing he would be off from work. Seconds later he calls back, but it wasnt him. Some girl said "me & him are busy at the moment, can he call you back later". I felt as though my heart dropped. I tried to call again within 5mins, hoping to talk to that girl. Just to tell her to pass the msg, "that I love him so much, after making a mistake this is the revenge I get, so be it".

He calls back later, explaining that he was still at work and someone answered his phone because it was on vibrate. He told me he had no intentions of talking to me after that day, & told me how hurt he was that I ruin all his plans of proposing this year. He said that everything was a waste. To wish him luck and that he needed time to rethink the whole relationship. "Don't call me or try to visit me". I was confused about the proposal cause 2 months prior he wasn't sure if he saw me in his future. 3wks later after the fight-he posted on facebook. His status as single "looking for new relationship in '08, marriage '09 & kids '10. Anyone interested come make my dream come true". That's how I found out I was single. So if you guys can help me out on this. ~brknhearted

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What Guys Said

 
Anonymous User
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Anonymous User (Age:25 to 29)      When: 3 months ago
Remember,

He puts you down to lower your self-esteem. He keeps your self-esteem low so you will not see the real power you have.

He knows your weaknesses. He knows your fears. Don't let him know that you are aware of this. This is the beginning of you breaking free.

YOU ARE THE SUN. The sun is powerful and beautiful. He is trying to contain the sun because he is greedy and selfish. And he knows that if he doesn't keep the sun contained eventually the sun will break free and everyone will see the true power and beauty that you possess. :)
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Teddy
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Teddy (Age:Under 18)      When: 4 months ago
I think that you should just get over him and move on, I no(being one myself) that guys can over re-act and if it was really serious then you should leave him and move on. Let him loose and hey you never know he might even thank you.
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What Girls Said

Kaleina
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Kaleina (Age:30 to 35)      When: 4 months ago
Wow! You need to sit back and let go of the "rest of the night" and realize that your ex cheated on you - which is the most important part of your question. He cheated on you - now get on facebook and be single yourself and move on.

Men can be callous when they've lost control of any situation, if he was joking about cheating, then it was very cold of him to be so callous. He's only moved into this mode of superiority because he knows for sure that you're chasing him, when you should not, therefore making him right. You need to be confident and realize that you made the right decision, and get past it now, rather than dwelling on a lost wedding proposal - look at it as not having to relive this moment 2 years into marriage.
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Yes, definitely

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Only if they trust each other fully

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No, because people can lie and cheat no matter the circumstances

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