My boyfriend and I have been together for six months but every 2 weeks when he gets paid everything always happens the same. I have my own place he has his. I buy myself everything never ask him for money. But as soon as he gets paid he goes straight to the bar, shows up at three in the morning all drunk and trying to bang in my door and going psycho for no reason. Then he spends a 2 week check in like 3 days then for the rest of the week I have to buy him everything, smokes, give him rides. He doesn't have a car or license. I don't know what to do. I love him but I think he's got a bad drinking problem.
Run away from the "pyscho" alcoholic, even if you love him. He will hurt hurt hurt you long term.
If you're truly strong, and honest, and accountable, and in love, then you do have an option to try to help him. But not by staying with him and "forgiving" him.
Instead, something like an intervention, where you're future is contingent on him going to alcohol abuse program. Then, upon successful completion, you have a chance to be with a "recovering alcoholic" if that's what you really want. And don't stay and tolerate it if he backslides, for the rest of his life. That's a lot of work, and not a real high chance of success. But if you're going to stay, stay only under terms like that. That would actually make you a stronger person than most, and he'd be more than lucky to have you because you loved him and helped him when he was sick. But I'm just saying, you might have better luck with a healthy guy than your current guy.
By the sounds of it he does have a drinking problem. In my line of work I see this all the time and the next step is not good for you. If he is already yelling at you when he is drunk there will be a time that he will probably get physical or maybe he already has. But when he is not drinking he will apologize and try to be nice and tell you how much he loves you but nothing will change until he stops drinking.
james1970115
(Age:36 to 45)
When: More than a year ago
Get rid of him now, he is using you for rides, money, and his money is only for booz. He is not ready for a relationship and seems you are, find someone who puts you FIRST!! You ladies deserve to be treated better. That is my opinion anyways.
Leave him! Sounds like its just going to get worse and in the end he could hurt you physically and mentally. Seriously. YOU DON'T NEED A DRUNK. You need someone that can take care of you and a house so if you ever get serious or end up with a child you don't have to work your ass off. And I'm not saying you shouldn't work and that you should be the little house wife I'm just saying that you need someone that could take care of you and the house if you ever wanted to be that little house wife. And come on this fool is old enough to drink but doesn't have a car or a license that right there should have been a red flag to dumb his ass.
No matter how much you love him, you can't miss a big RED flag in your relationship. He has a serious addiction. He needs help. If he can't overcome it, you have to think deeply. My friend's husband is an alcoholic, and no matter how much she loved him, she couldn't take it no more. She divorced him. It's hard, but you have to think about yourself too! Good Luck!
sassy-sheryl77
(Age:36 to 45)
When: More than a year ago
RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN !!! get as far away from this guy as possible and try not to be so atracted to men who need to be FIXED, find one who is fine the way he is and save yourself the pain and time, been there done that. Tell him he needs A A and you need to get away .
You really need to leave him cause one day he's is going to get so drunk that your life may be put in danger and you may not even know. But anyway you need to try to talk to him while he is SOBER and just tell him how you really feel okay and tell me what happened.
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Describe your ideal first date; Where do you go? What do you wear? How does the date end?
Honestly, it doesn't matter as long as the guy planned something and put effort into it. Of course I wouldn't mind having dinner down in the city wearing a little black dress and then going for a walk on a really nice night. I'm not a high maintenance kind of woman and the most simple and real things make me happy!
Afterwards..what will your date know about you?
Probably a lot. I believe in complete openness and honesty right away. He'd probably know that I like cars too much and I am confident in what I've accomplished this far... and I'm not telling any more ;)
(Age:18 to 24)
When: More than a year ago
