A girl I just started dating will be going to college about 14 hours away from my college next year. I really don't know how often she will be coming home or how often I would actually be able to go see her but this is just causing me to be burdened. We will have the summer together and I'm really looking forward to that and who knows where our relationship will be after that. I guess it's almost like I don't want to get too attached this summer and then try to make a long-distance relationship work (which I have no experience with). But at the same time, she is an awesome girl and I don't want to just break up with her and let her go. I want to try to make it work. If anyone has any experience with this type of situation let me in on how you handled it.
I have gone through this myself actually. I was dating a guy for about a year or so and then we both went off to college, literally a three hour plane flight away. So we never got to see each other. We tried to make it work though and it just turned into nonstop jealousy. He thought I was going to meet someone at college so he wouldn't let me go out anywhere. I felt like I really missed out on a lot of my college experience and I really regret it. If you are only 18 - 24. I would say you are definitely too young to get involved in something that serious. I'd maybe have fun with her over the summer, but don't get too attached. It will only be a burden.
I can definitely see where you're coming from. As far as holding myself back, I'm a sophomore at my college and haven't met anyone I'd even potentially want to date. So to me it's a no-brainer. But I even told her before we actually officially started dating that I really don't want to hold her down. I'm sure she will meet people in college and I don't want her to have a boyfriend back home acting as an anchor on her. But deep down, I can't help but wish she'd see what's out there and come back to me. - 3 months ago
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Instead of involving yourselves in this mess and having each other on a leash, just break it off when you go to college and see what happens. My boyfriend and I didn't break it off and now we're still together and we're unhappy because we were too young when we were dating, and the long distance thing took its toll on us. We both ended up cheating on each other. Now I just want out to experience what I didn't get in college. We both went through a lot changes in the past few years because we were to young - 3 months ago
I have not gone through this, but you said for yourself you're just not ready to let her go for. Communication is important but believe that distance won't tear you two apart is even better. Talk to her and see how she feels about the whole situation because things like that tear us girls apart as well, we just want to know you guys are hurt by the situation too. And when summer comes, don't hold back any feelings because what is she going to think? Cherish every moment when you see her when she comes to visit you, because anything can happen to you two and regretting something like not giving it all you have is probably one the worst feelings you can have.
I guess that's one of my main concerns. Is just should I hold back or put everything I've got into the relationship. And I think you're right! I don't want to regret anything that could have been so I'm really wanting to just not worry about it and do what my heart tells me to do now. Even though it could be hard later on, it might actually make it easier looking back and thinking that we never held back and therefore have no regrets. - 3 months ago
You have to decide what it is that you want out of the relationship. Do you want to half ass the relationship by holding things back during the summer and live the rest of you life wondering about the what ifs? I would guess that you don't. You have to set it on the line. This is what love is about, going out and leaving yourself exposed. If you don't think that it will work than that is exactly how it will turn out. You have the exact relationship that you want with her. So if you want to give it your all in your heart, what is holding you back?
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