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Deeplove55

Is love a feeling or a choice?

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Deeplove55 (Age:18 to 24)     When: 6 months ago
Views: 89     Category: Other
My friend and I are having a debate on this. He seems to believe that Love is something we can control from happening like its a choice but I argue its not a choice. It is a feeling that you can't control from happening when you are with someone. Who disagrees with me?

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ncstrike
557  
ncstrike (Age:Under 18)      When: 6 months ago
This is hard to say. Because the choices someone makes defines them. And love is about the person you like and how they are and act. So its a feeling influenced by that persons choices.
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TheSunGod
662  
TheSunGod (Age:18 to 24)      When: 6 months ago
Love is the feeling that results from choices we make in life. Choices that define who we are and how we interact with others.
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sourgrain
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sourgrain (Age:18 to 24)      When: 6 months ago
I would say attraction isn't a choice but love is because there are so many other things that go into a love relationship and you can choose whether you want to do it or not, but basic primal attractions are not a choice.
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Question Asker No you cannot choose to love but you can choose to avoid the opportunity of love by not allowing yourself to get close. Its a feeling to where you feel like you're on cloud 9. You can't choose that. It happens to us if we don't try to avoid it but sometimes you can run from love forever. Someone will capture your heart to where you can't help that you start to develop deep feelings. you c? not a choice. - 6 months ago
 

What Girls Said

 
Anonymous User
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Anonymous User (Age:18 to 24)      When: 6 months ago
Love is an action. Actions are choices. Even though we don't feel all warm and fuzzy towards somebody all the time, doesn't mean that we can't love them all the time. I do agree that we can't control our feelings though- some people just make sparks fly when we're around them.
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kisses00
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kisses00 (Age:Under 18)      When: 6 months ago
Well, I think it is definitely NOT a choice! You don't choose who you love! It's not like you walk down the street and decide oh hey! look a hot guy/girl! I officially love him/her! No, it's not like that!

It is a very strong feeling where you feel connected to someone so it makes you like the person! You don't go around choosing who you love! Yes, you can turn down love, by saying no and what-not but that technically is not choosing who you love!

Maybe someone loves you but you don't feel the same. Its not like that person chose to love you. B/c obviously if you chose who you loved you wouldn't have such a hard time after a break-up b/c you would "choose" someone else to love right away! Thats exactly what you guys are saying when you say you "choose" who you love

I think I made my point :)
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skootz
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skootz (Age:18 to 24)      When: 6 months ago
Love is a feeling but it is a choice to follow through with it [=
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XworthyXofXloveX
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XworthyXofXloveX (Age:Under 18)      When: 6 months ago
I think...sometimes love, isn't a choice. It just is. It's there, and you have no say with it. It's irrational at times, and just confusing at others.

So, with saying that, I agree with you.
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JenH
606  
JenH (Age:30 to 35)      When: 6 months ago
I agree with you that love is not a choice, it is a feeling that cannot be controlled. Relationships are where the control kicks in...maintaining a relationship when the butterflies die and feelings aren't as strong / obvious.
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daydreamercarla
145  
daydreamercarla (Age:18 to 24)      When: 6 months ago
Well, technically it is a feeling that we cannot control. Us humans have hormones. These hormones react when we are attracted to someone. These chemicals in our brains actually prevents us from thinking rationally. That is why whenever someone is in love their heart beats fast and they get these minor impulses. (That my friends is what happens when we are attracted to someone).

This happened to me once, I didn't want to like that hangs with the same group of people I do but every time I saw him, I got all nervous, my heart beat fast, and it's like I was having an outer body experience because in my head I was telling myself that I don't like that guy but my body told me the opposite. As much as I wanted these impulses to stop I couldn't!

Therefore, I truly believe that love is not by choice but by feeling, aka hormones!
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