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a400m-runner

Should I change my personality to get girls?

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a400m-runner (Age:18 to 24)     When: 3 months ago
Views: 130     Category: Dating
Why do all the a**holes get the best girls? College is not much different. Should I Change my entire personality to become the sex driven male persona that my counter-parts have developed, or should I continue on my path of hopeless romantic in the shadows?
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What Girls Said

ncshygurl
201  
ncshygurl (Age:18 to 24)      When: 2 months ago
No do not change your personality! I assure you that there are women looking for guys who are not a**holes. Perhaps you're looking at the wrong women or maybe you're looking in the wrong places for the right women. Seriously, if you're just looking to get laid, then by all means, become a sex driven, shallow, egotistical, chauvinistic male; but if you're looking for something truly meaningful, that will last a long time and make you happy, then don't change who you are. I tried changing myself for a guy once, I was the most unhappy that I've ever been in my entire life. Stay who you are, be comfortable with yourself, and you'll find a good woman. Most ladies (note the word "ladies") truly want a gentleman who will respect them and treat them the way that they deserve to be treated. Don't lose hope. And by all means, come out of the shadows! How do you expect the women to see you if you're hiding? : )
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ALWAYSclassy
2507  
ALWAYSclassy (Age:18 to 24)      When: 3 months ago
You are looking at the wrong type of girls. If you think shallow, insecure girls with low self esteem are the best (is it by any chance because they're "hot"?) then by all means become an asshole. But if you're truly romantic and want an actual relationship, don't change who you are. Guys who treat girls with respect are the ones who get the best girls. Don't let girls walk all over you and have confidence, but there is a difference between a nice guy and a pushover.
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love-u-longtime19
64  
love-u-longtime19 (Age:18 to 24)      When: 3 months ago
Honey you're not alone girls are thinking the same thing about why the so called blonde bimbos get all the hotties,but truly we ask ourselves where all the romantic guys are because we tire of dealing with players and jerks. Never think that changing who you are is worth any person's affection because its only worth it if the person is into the real you, its too much work to try and impress them. Don't worry she'll come along. I know you probably hear something along the same lines from others but I'm speaking from experience.
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jmc46
43  
jmc46 (Age:18 to 24)      When: 3 months ago
I don't think you should change your personality - though a boost in confidence may help. This could be the difference between pining away silently "in the shadows" and actually talking to a girl.
Secondly, do you really want the kind of girls who PREFER someone who treats them like crap? This shows that they are shallow and they clearly don't value the importance of personality. These are definitely, definitely not "the best girls".
Basically, as I said: confidence is key. While it's easier said than done, talking and getting to know girls is the best way to spark interest.
Lastly: ugh college. Stay away from frats. You do not want the girls who hang out there.
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littlesenorita
623  
littlesenorita (Age:18 to 24)      When: 3 months ago
What are the best girls? Women love romance, maybe they just don't know that's who you are! get out and mingle-and be yourself
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Belleza
1729  
Belleza (Age:18 to 24)      When: 3 months ago
Maybe your really looking in the wrong places for a girl...maybe she's under your nose and you haven't spotted her yet....don't give up, you'll find her!!!!
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elphie00 If by "best girls" you mean shallow sluts, then let the other guys have her. Wait for someone who will like you. Certainly, you should not change what you are. Keep looking for her, though! - 3 months ago
 
 

What Guys Said

Vassar
762  
Vassar (Age:25 to 29)      When: 3 months ago
Don't let them walk all over you...your the catch here...let them throw themselves to jerks that's not what should concern you....don't worry about them..instead go for something more your speed...women are predators...vicious animals...you have to see them for what they really are...that way you can beat them at there own game...play to win...cuz in the end they are the ones keeping score...don't let your guard down and fold and mistreat these women as a lot of guys fall prey to...its their planet its their rules...if you f*** it up they will have you by the balls...then you'll be cryin for the rest of your life.

And I know you've heard it before these guys out here...be a gentleman, be smart, but be stern, discrimative, and cold...live your life as your dreams.
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sexwiseman
3445  
sexwiseman (Age:30 to 35)      When: 3 months ago
Been there, done that. I think I even posted a response for a similar question....Anyway, dude, here is the reality: women don't like wimpy guys. I don't know how else to put that, but women enjoy the company of guys that are confident, funny, masculine, and I suppose romantic at the same time. Do you find yourself being called 'a nice guy' or being told some nice girl will come your way? If this is so, then you need to re-analyze what you're doing that is turning off the females.

Your question shouldn't be why do all the a$$holes get the best girls---your question should be, what is it that the a$$holes do to get the best girls? Once you figure it out, and incorporate it to your personality, then you will also be getting the girls.

I've read the responses you got, and hell, they are weak. You need to take action before the best years of your life pass you by. Is not that you have to change your personality, but more like, how can you improve it. Think of athletes---they got a natural talent to do well in their sports, yet they get training to help them polish their skills.

You have your own personality, what you need to do now, is polish it with some player skills, and then you'll be on your way. If you sit around waiting for the girl to come by, you'll be like the women that sit around waiting for mr prince to come by!
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That-Guy
1661  
That-Guy (Age:18 to 24)      When: 3 months ago
You can always change and I encourage you to as it requires self-reflection and analysis.

Now, who do you want to be? An A-hole, jock or more rounded and outgoing person?

Like the girls have already pointed out, there's the same girl asking herself the same exact question.
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vortexofdoom97
544  
vortexofdoom97 (Age:Under 18)      When: 3 months ago
Being in the shadows is your issue. You need to get out, and really be outgoing and romantic at the same time. I used the same excuse for the longest time, but then I broke out of my shell and apparently, I'm a real charmer. Just talk to the girls, and you'll probably find that they'll be crazy for you.
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lovebird01
4220  
lovebird01 (Age:Over 45)      When: 3 months ago
Nah, you can't change who you are. Be real, and there will be a girl somewhere waiting for you. Be patient; there are girls out there who like romantic guys!
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Did you ever not date because friends didn't approve?
reptilia86 asked Yesterday

Yes I did have that problem

Yes, I still don't date because of my friends.

No, I don't care what anyone thinks about my dates

That had never crossed through me at all

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