my man has cheated on me a whole lot of times,and each time I know he did but he won't tell me.to protect his image to me and he doesn't want me to feel so bad.he loves me and I can feel it I know when we do..he is just in situation where his baggage is conquering him..its hard when you shared your past life with someone for a long time and you have child with them.i pretty much understand that..guys do not show emotions usually when they try and move on but can't or yet..and yes they could love again even if they are stuck with the past still...i honor the good men who are victims of love for trying to and do the best they could to make someone happy even if they are not...the more I understand him the more he loves me.eventually he could get out of that shell he is still in and learn that the new place in my heart is better..he wanted to get married soon but I said to him it will happen naturally do not force yourself doing things to try and make things better..cause its not..when you are ready you will know and I would I can feel when he is.connection is a thing we should be very sensitive about..
how many in here have worn my shoes?
Update: i like what I'm hearing guys thank you very much..that's the way I am I guess and it works for me..it doesn't work for other people when they follow what is "supposedly" but guys thank so much for the answer I'm just trying to see other perspectives..
2 months ago
maybe he knew that ur answer was going to be "no, we'll get married whenever we're ready".
just like "germanotaku" said add on that. he could be sexually and life confused, (which we both agree he is) but he clearly doesn't know how to deal with it. BUT regardless of how confused he get, if he truly loves you, he wouldn't cheat on you "a whole lot of times". he only finds the sweetheart lovely lady in you, but love doesn't exist.
and I have worn that shoes where I was the nice guy who always said the nice lovely things and who could be showed off to people, and there was a f***-buddy that I didn't know about for a whole year.
so it happens, and its bad when it does, but its good you are more aware of it than I did =)
I can say but one thing to your story: If someone loves another one, they DO NOT CHEAT on them.
And really, there is no way to talk around this, my thinking on that matter cannot be turned around in any way. If I love someone, truly do, then why would I feel the need to be with someone else? In no way can anyone come up with a reasonable answer...
That is somehow the "supposed" but life is too large to not have anything like my situation..he loves this girl,she left him,they have child together,they see each other often because of the child..the girl is married and she is having hard time about,my boyfriend cares for her and he's only human,she tried and get in the way,she knows how to manipulate his feelings..there areguys that are just weak,and I feel as if he needed the type of girl that I am..i wish he feels the way you do but no..dnt be sorrry. - 2 months ago
if he loves you he won't be cheating on you.. if he asked you to marry him and you said "later" then that may have pushed him away. ask him about that maybe ? if that isn't the key ? is he going with other women because he wants someone as good as you or because its just a guy lust thing ? time can do two things - he might 'grow out' of this or you might lose the chance to have someone else who really does love you. Really if he cheats - its goodbye... don't run away from the fact that the hardest times for you may still be in the future... sorry.
Looks like you're a glutton for punishment. You're making so many excuses for him, and you're acting as if he's a victim. Stay with him if you want to keep hurting. Maybe you like the drama?
Thats why its ok...the more you ignore it and acknoledge the more you you hurt less..maybe I just love him really and real love is actually unconditional..other than that,humanly..we don't fight over it and guess what I get cared of alot..he's too afraid of rejection and people are like that sometimes..lastnight I had talk to him about self steem and how does it ruin other peoples judgment sometimes,makes them go the wrong way..he burst into tears..cuz he knows he did me wrong.. - 2 months ago
i have worn your shoes and I am telling you now he does not value you in any way and I hope that you stop believing that he des everyone makes mistakes but not the same ones over and over again. I suggest you just move on with your life and let him pursue her or whoever else he wants to I have kids with someone outside of my relationship and I do not sleep with their fathers there is no excuess for what he is doing. Ture most guys don't show emotions but they still no right from wrong. Honor yourself not him. I know that you are not happy with what is going on cause the question would not be here.Take those shoes off get a new pair better yet find you a friend someone just to chill with give your self time to figure out what it is that you want to do and what you want in a relationship. It is not likely to get any better than what it is now.
He doesn't love you, if he did he would never have cheated, not once. Staying with a guy that has cheated even once is weak but that fact that he has done it many times, is pathetic, it shows you have no respect for yourself. He doesn't love. You could do sooo much better. Sorry if you don't like what I said, but it's the truth.
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