Let me jump in by saying thank you to every one on this web site. I always browse on here and get great advice. But now I’m in a situation that I don’t know what to do.
I have been with this Girl for just under a year. She is really amazing. Everything was great. But then +- 5 months ago I noticed things where getting different. But around that time I got a promotion from work and had a lot of stress on me and just before that was when we had sex for the first time. Also me and her first time ever, we where virgins. This got pretty bad with me because of all the stress so I didn’t notice that something was wrong. She wasn’t always there to comfort me and I wanted her to be there more for me. But she wasn’t. A month ago she completely stopped all emotions in our relationship. She wouldn’t tell me that se loves me. She won’t kiss me and barley hug me. She just said that she doesn’t know why. She has a strange feeling and doesn’t know what it is. And it feels like something is wrong. I assured her that everything is ok. Because of this I myself sorted out my issues to be there for her. But she kept pushing me away. This went on until last week Wednesday. I invited her for and milk shake just to go out a bit. But when I picked her up I could see there was a lot wrong. We talked and she told me things no one knows. And she trusts me more than any one. But she can not go on with us. And when we stopped at her house she said that I should move on and that she is not the one for me. I was shocked. I just told her everything will be ok. But she still broke us up. The next evening I smsd her and asked her how she was. She said not good but that is what she expected. And nothing after that. Sunday she logged on Facebook messenger. I asked her how she and she said fine. But I got the idea that she really didn’t want to talk to me and she logged of very quickly. I haven’t talked to her again… I Love her with my whole heart. And I know she loves me because she told me when she broke up with me that she doesn’t know why because she still loves me. But it has to be done… Now I don’t know what to do. The last week has been worse than Hell. But I will take her back in an instant. I will climb the highest mountain if I have to. I’ll take any pain if I have to. But I don’t know if I should. I don’t want to make her hurt even more. Because I know this is hurting. Hurting her is the last thing I ever want to happen to her. And I don’t want to be remembered as the guy that couldn’t get it in his head that we are over. Should I fight or let her go? And what should I do if I fight? Every time I log in on Facebook and I see her I feel ALL the pain from scratch again. I have thought about removing her, but I just cannot get myself to click on the Confirm button… Should I let her go and be a respectable gentleman with a great great scar on his heart… or fights risking much more…?
Update: I need more space to paste my update... Mmmm...I'm just gonna comment below the update.
2 months ago
Update: Sorry for the messy comments... But part one is at xloveangelx and pa rt 2 at nitro3000. Thank you again!
2 months ago
This is a very complicated situation. Well, I don't know what she told you that night, but it sounds like something is really wrong in her life. It sounds to me like she has a lot on her mind, and she can't deal with a relationship. Back off a little bit, don't suffocate her. When you see her online, don't say anything to her, wait and see if she says anything to you. Once in awhile message her and ask how she's doing. But don't be afraid to get out there, find someone else, in case she doesn't come back. I know its hard, but if you really love her, you have to let go of her, if that's what she really wants.
Thanx a lot for your reply. There is not much I can do really. Except sort myself out and let her know I’m there for her. And let her sort her self out.
Last night when I got home I chatted with her again. This time she was a bit more willing to chat. I asked her if her family and friends taking good care of her. She then replied: “no, I’m taking care of myself, and not doing a very good job at it...”. So I replied: - 2 months ago
loveangel is right, this is a complicated situation, and this is merely my opinion and what I would do. to me if you love someone, you'll fight for them, and I know exactly how you feel when you say hurting her is the last thing you want to do, so if she thinks she can't be with you (at this time) tell her that you still care about her and you'll always be there for her, it leaves the choice with her and lets her know that you still care about her, which may make her see her true feeelings for you as well.
So I replied: “These things take time. We don’t always have time. But things work out one way or another. When ever you feeling ready to talk. Doesn’t matter when and where I’ll be here and wanting to listen. But please put your self first.” And I got no further reply. - 2 months ago
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