My boyfriend was my first but I wasn't his, during the beginning of our relationship he talked about his experiences with his ex a lot, which made me really uncomfortable and I almost felt like I had to live up to the standards that they had even though the relationship went badly.
We talked about marriage and our future together a lot, I asked him to stop talking about his ex, he finally did but I was still really hurt over it (because he told me gross details about their sex life). He told me that he just felt really bad that he didn't wait until marriage so he acted like a typical guy in order to feel better about it, and he "bragged" to people who thought that it was okay even though he thinks it was wrong of him to do.
But then later he said it was right with us because I'm his soul mate and he wants to marry me so its okay but a 3rd party told me he bragged about us one night! And even told his guy friends intimate details about me and how he wanted us to get "freakier" in bed. However in the meantime he has lied to me and kissed one of my best friends, it was for a play. But he didn't tell me, she did and it was really hard to get through but we did.
He has lied a bunch of times and each time he has said he never will but it always seem to do it again, however I believe him this time, because nothing bad has happened in a long time.
He's a flirt but he's changed a lot from back then, but I sometimes get scared that I'll get hurt again he's not relatively good looking so I think he was just flirty for self-confidence, but he's trying to change that now.
However when I do get scared about getting hurt or being lied to again I try to talk to him about it and just tell him how I feel (Is this wrong? ) but he just gets really mad at me and hurtful and says I'm just paranoid and crazy and untrusting, but I don't accuse him of doing anything I just tell him I get scared sometimes.
but recently he's been talking to this girl who is helping him with a play,. He asked her to, and she asked him out for supper so they can talk about it together, he turned her down because he didn't think it was right. But he still talks to her even though the play thing hasn't turned out like it was supposed to, and now he emails her all the time and she compliments him a lot and acts really happy to see him, it makes me feel really awkward, now she said she is going to work with him this summer and my boyfriend failed to mention that to me.
when I talked to him about it he immediately apologized and said he should have told me but he forgot. Even though I told him I was kinda scared about their relationship I love him and I don't want to lose him, lately we've been good, except for that girl working with him most of this stuff happened along time ago we've been dating for 2 and a half years now, and I don't think I hold any of this stuff against him but it still gets me now and then and in the back of my head I think "what if this is happening again? "
Hmm. How long had you been quizzing him before he called you paranoid? Generally I would think that him using names like that is a sign of possible trouble (as is answering a question with a question), but if you'd been asking for a long time that night, then he may have been tired of the inquiry.
So far you haven't said anything besides that which would trouble me. Granted I'm removed from the thing, but his activities that involve a play are just that - related to the play. I have a cousin who performs and have found that these thespians are a group that travel together and hang out - it's a mutual interest that they get excited about. And they also have to network because small theatre groups are hard to get into.
I am a worrier like you. My mind can get away from me and cause all kind of unnecessary torment. So far I'm not seeing a case that would lead to hanging him - I'm thinking you might be worrying too much.