My boyfriend of a year and a half recently broke up with me. In our relationship, he brought up that he wanted to get married. Of course I was happy about that. I have been in numerous relationships but I knew that he was the one for me. We are both in the military and he got orders to move. After this he changed his mind and said he wasn't ready to get married. Which I respect, he said he was scared and he didn't know if he was making the right decision but he wasn't ready. Well, after this I was crushed for a little while, but we made it through that. After he left we talked on the phone, emailed, it was okay. But one night I asked him about the future. Not marriage, but our relationship...BOOM he drops the bomb. He said that he couldn't be with me anymore. My heart sank...he tells me that he loves me and my daughter than I could ever imagine, and that he will always love me. He also says that he can't imagine being with any other woman. I just don't get it. I am just devastated. He hung up the phone on me and I haven't heard a word from him in days. Will he ever change his mind about me? Do you think he just needs space for a while? I do love him, we were basically like a married couple before he left. I love him so much and I just want to know if I should have any hope for the relationship.
Update: Well, he said that he wanted to be with me...just not get married anymore...initially--thanks AlanHB for the insight =)
18 days ago
Update: both of you have excellent points...thanks so much!
18 days ago
It doesn't sound like there's any chance. He broke up with you twice really. If a guy wants to marry you, then decides that he doesn't want to anymore, that's a MASSIVE warning sign. It means he's not as happy as he used to be in the relationship, and is on the downwards slope. He then tops this off by saying he doesn't want to be with you anymore.
It would be lovely if people just said what they meant and meant what they said, wouldn't it? Unfortunately, we don't always have a clear idea of what we want. It sounds like he's confused. It's hard to let go of a loved one, no matter how much your feelings have changed because people are most comfortable with what they are familiar with. I know I've felt that confusion before. I knew our the relationship was over but couldn't really let go because I was afraid I was making a mistake. How can one know whether or not they're letting go of the best thing ever? You can't. You can't ever really know how he truly feels. He could be saying what you want to hear because he doesn't want to hurt you - but his life is moving on while you guys are apart. He could be confused by his feelings - he wants to be faithful yet those around him are tempting him to be single. All you can do is get by one day at a time with your own best interests in mind. Moving on doesn't mean forget about him, it just means to not let opportunities slip by because your waiting for this to work out. I vote to keep the friendship alive but learn to live without him. Not because it won't work out, because there is always a chance that it will, but just in case. I guess I'm trying to tell you to hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Good luck.
Thanksgiving is right around the corner and just like the last year and the year before, you will most likely spend it with your family. And just like everyone else, you have a crazy uncle or an...
$20 Amazon Gift Card
Check out the winner of the last contest! Worst Pick Up Lines
Winner received $20 Amazon Gift Card
Hi Guys,I need advice with the following situation: I got close to this guy about a month ago and we had a great start. We were talking everyday for...
My boyfriend and I dated for four years. We lived together for two and are both 27. I lost my job in February and couldn’t find another one in NYC....
And men, stop trying to change women too...Gothca! I bet everyone thought this would be another diatribe about how ladies have lost touch with what men need in a modern society.Nah.Both sexes are...
A new girl just moved into my house. Lately I feel like I am the mascot to a sorority. There are now 4 girls living upstairs, granted one of them is only three but I think she has the hots for me. I...
Disclaimer: GirlsAskGuys cannot guarantee the accuracy of answers, opinions and advice submitted by members. Please use common sense when following or omitting any content on GirlsAskGuys.com