I recently found out my boyfriend has been talking to other girls well . . .let me break it down I looked at his phone records and called a few numbers back ...they were females , to make a long story short some were old friends a couple were girls he claimed he pulled over in the car and got there numbers he said he never talked to these girls consistently it was really when we argued ,it wasn't something he has always been doing, just since we moved in together recently had a baby and things have been stressful! I would have never found this out had he not gotten a t-mobile phone recently where you can check the call records! he said he felt unappreciated , when we argue I do say some hurt full things make threats that ill find someone else . He is a good guy compared to most works ,respects me, takes care of the baby, blah blah! and we are together a great deal so I don't think he was talking to these girls like on a daily basis or that its any thing serious but it hurt like hell to find out! ...i never did anything like this to him I don't even look at other guys! I can admit he puts more into the relationship and I do cause a lot of problems due to my own insecurities, really because he's the only guy I ever been with sexually besides this one other kid in high school one time not even worth mentioning only happened once! And my boyfriend has been with like two many girls to count! OK not that many but I'm sure it at least 20. so yeah that gets to me! Any ways I still question like did he cheat on me? how could he hide this from me and so well! ...sorry this was so long but can anyone relate? any advice? How do I get past this?
I used to chat to girls online and stuff when I was with my girlfriend of 3 years...I took me getting caught to realize how much it hurt her. I guess the habit started a long time ago and I kind of just dismissed it as acceptable, but it's NOT.
Explain to him how it makes you feel, how its not ok, and if he feels like that way every time you argue etc then you two need to come up with some alternatives for him.
there really is no way to get past it other than time but honestly why would you? he runs to these other girls every time you fight so why would you want to stick with him? besides that you are checking his cell phone records so there are obviously trust issues there. I have been there as him and sure he might just be talking to them now but it only multiplies the longer it goes on. eventually he will start hanging out with them or meeting them until finally he starts cheating and then there is no turning back because you rarely if ever get over being cheated on.
if you really want to try to get over this then you need to stop threatening to find someone new and start putting more into the relationship. Having kids is always stressful but you still need to try and make time for each other like before you had the baby. try to actively strengthen your relationship and show him that you do care and he is still the one you want to be with and is appreciated. that is the best way to get him to stop running to these other girls and in time things will get better, you will trust each other more and you will get over this.
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(Age:18 to 24)
When: 4 months ago
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