I can't remember exactly how this saying goes, but it's something along the lines of girls date bad boys, they marry nice guys. Basically, bad boys are attractive, but they're short term.
I think a cross between "bad boy" and "nice guy" is best. Being polite and sweet is a positive, and being a little on the daring/adventurous side is good too. If you're too much of a bad boy or nice guy, you become kind of predictable.
no I don't think that all girls want a 'BadBoy'. I think that they're just fixated with the 'BadBoy' image but not necessarily the persona. for instance, a girl would be attracted to a guy with a 6pack dressed in jeans, Timberland boots and a wife beater top with chains around his neck. tattoo covered with piercings, but it turns out that he's actually a soft teddy bear.
i try to look past the outside appearance but I'd be lying if I said that I don't check out 'hot' guys, more so if he happens to be a fireman (just an obsession that I've acquired). but when it comes to dating, I'd prefer a nice, polite, well mannered male, while at the same time I don't want someone who's so nice that he can't put me back into my place if I've crossed the line or can't defend himself should the need arise.
Only girls who want to be screwed over like the bad boys. I've gone for them before and trust me, nothing good can come out of a relationship with them. You'll just end up hurt and confused. I like a guy that makes me feel appreciated and wanted, not another "name in his little black book." :-)
not for me anyway I love nice guys I've never liked a bad guy they try to hard to be cool and there so up themselves I want a nice guy I can trust and not have to worry about him doing something bad on me bad guys just don't impress me at all
Okay what about guys think about it this way. What do guys want? Do all guys want a sexy, fun, and flirtatious girl? Hm.well maybe when they're young, sometimes. But it all depends on the personality of the guy and the girl. All girls want to feel loved, beautiful, chosen, needed, adored, protected, irreplaceable, and valued. So if it's easier for them to have a bad boy, those are the ones that will make them feel beautiful.physically. So that's their easiest bet. Now that I have received affection physically and emotionally I know better. So it's a lesson that the girl has to learn.
I hate cocky bastards who are bulky and wear tight shirts think they're so cool. And the ones who stares at themselves while working out. I would love to give them a nice juicy cock slap! I was never interested in douche bags. I love intelligent, nice, sweet, and nerdy guys.
Women are raised from a young age to think relationships and their romantic life will be like a Disney cartoon. From the time they're little girls they expect Prince Charming will come along at some point and sweep them off their feet. Well, the world doesn't work that way. That being said, there's no reason you can't be a woman's Prince Charming. However, you must first understand that who he truly was isn't what most people would expect. The truth is actually something that goes against the grain of most Disneyesque ideals of romantic love and chivalry.
The Prince Charming Theory is a combination of essentially two factors:
Preselection - An evolutionary shortcut, or tool, humans developed to determine from afar if a person is high value. If others look upon someone favorably we are typically draw to them and/or wonder what makes them valuable. In females this wonder sparks preliminary attraction. The effect of preselection, like having women crawling all over you, makes it a hell of a lot easier to open up other women later on. In some cases women will begin to open you!
Perceived Value - This is when a high value male chooses a woman. The effect this has on women is at the heart of the Prince Charming Theory: When a high value male with lots of choice regarding sexual/relationship partners chooses a particular woman then she is perceived as the female with the most value of any of those he could choose from. This makes a woman feel special and has the benefit of making her value, cherish, and respect the relationship so much more than if she merely chose the man. This is intrinsically different from the traditional paradigm of women choosing men and is why women will often chase a man, or otherwise tolerate abuse or otherwise bad treatment, by men that seem disinterested or that have 3 other women on speed dial.
I don't generally agree with Disneyesque ideals of romance, or any relationship advice given by mainstream media as it's usually terrible and chock full of social programming. But when it comes to Prince Charming, he was the ultimate version of what men should strive to be if they want control over their relationships and want women to chase him. He was preselected, had options, and he chose the women he wished to interact with. Furthermore, those women who he chose felt special because he chose them. That's the secret sauce of Prince Charming Theory.
When you reach that point it's important to note that qualifying women is integral to keeping them. If not, they will have worthiness issues.
To illustrate what I mean: The answer to the question, "Why does the guy who doesn't appear to care as much about the girl get the girl?" is simple: The nice guy cares too much, too soon. He has made the woman too important and too valuable and it shows in everything he says and does. He is too available, too eager to please, too accommodating, and he gives too much -- all without getting anything in return. By doing so, he has made himself appear desperate, insecure, needy of this woman's attention, affection, and approval -- and he has stripped himself of any value in her eyes. After all, if he's already doing and giving everything, without her doing or giving anything - why would she value him? She won't. She is not going to value him any more than he values himself. What she is going to do is look for someone else, someone who she perceives as being more worthy, more confident, and more valuable. It works like this: Once you need something, or you want it too badly, you forfeit your strength and lose all power of negotiation. You are in a position of weakness and you are perceived as weak. Someone (or something) else is in control of you, the situation, and it's outcome. Men in this situation appear to be anything but confident, strong, and exciting. More, they are perceived as being unworthy and as lacking value. Translation: Things that are easily acquired, obtained, or maintained, without any effort or sacrifice, lack value. it's human nature. The secret to why the cocky guy wins with women, over the nice guy, is that he is perceived as being a stronger, more confident guy with more value. How? He never invests everything -- his entire being, ego, and self-worth in what one woman's response or reaction to him is. He doesn't gush with compliments; he isn't always available; he doesn't give too much; and he knows he isn't going to die if a woman says "no" to him. More, his attitude is, yeah, I'd like to go out with you, but if I can't, that's OK -- I'm a busy guy, with exciting things going on, and lots of other options.
Saw this posted on one of the community forums. It's a great example of why men with choice are attractive to women and ties in nicely with my Prince Charming Theory (coming soon).
Are you a nice guy who has always wondered why the cocky guy -- the one who barely appears interested in the girl -- is usually the one who gets the girl? Have you suffered from hearing the words, "You're a really nice guy, but I only like you as a friend," from a woman who you would do (or may, in fact, have already done) just about anything and everything for -- only to turn around and watch her date (or even chase) a guy who treats her like she's nothing special? And are you stumped wondering why she would date a guy who treats her like that when she could have you who would treat her like a princess and give her everything she wants? Well, you better brace yourself because I'm going to tell you a couple of secrets that you might not want to hear. First, "nice" equates with boring and predictable. Look up "nice" in the dictionary and you find: pleasant; agreeable; satisfactory. In other words, average -- not exceptional, not exciting, and not sexy.I'll bet you've never heard a woman say she didn't want to date a guy because he was too confident, too passionate, or too exciting -- have you? But, I'll bet you have heard women say things like, "He's such a nice guy. He's so sweet and he's always there for me, but I only like him as a friend." Or, "He's such a good guy -- kind, thoughtful, generous, honest, loyal -- but there's no chemistry. He just doesn't turn me on." Sadly, I hear it all the time. The fact is, Mr. Nice Guy, you cannot bore a woman into feeling attracted to you or into wanting to date you. And as obvious as that sounds, if you are one of those guys I described that is exactly what you are trying to do. And it won't work. Please understand that I am not suggesting that you mistreat women or disrespect them in any way. What I suggesting is that you value and respect yourself more.
I found this on the pickuppodcast.com forums and is a repost off the myspace dating forums.
This girl is a really cute 18 year old girl from dallas. Holy shit she is super honest and spot on. Guys, this will blow your minds if you haven't realized this already.
Not to mention that a year ago this wouldn't resonate so much with me.
Cute Girl says:
I like nice guys; that's not the problem. I just met you and you are telling me how much you want to date me and asking for my phone number and I am probably not ready. You just come on too strong and too fast. You come across as desperate by telling me how special and beautiful I am, you tell me you LOVE ME SOOO MUCH, that you will always treat me right, how I'm the one you have always been looking for, how good you will treat me, and all that rubbish.
I'd rather a guy try to get into my pants. If only you would just give me a little time and space, but NOOO you have to LOVE me. So I choose the good looking bad boys. You can slap their face and they just smile. At least with the bad boys, if and when I decide I'm not interested, they don't give a hoot. I'm not going to hurt them.
Like most girls, I’m a companionate person; I don’t wish to wish to hurt anyone. But if I decide I don’t want to date you anymore, you are going to be SOOO hurt. I can see it in your face, your expression, and body language. You try to get me back, you mope and complain, you point out all the things you have given me, and tell me how badly I’m treating you, or maybe even talk about suicide.
I don't want to deal with any of that crap, let alone most of it. If you give me the slightest indication you are going to be that way, that's it; I'm not having anything to do with. If you act like that, I don’t think you are a nice guys at all, I think you are a selfish clingy bastard posing as nice guys just to get me, the girl. You don’t care about me; if you did, you would be happy for me when I wanted to go because that would be what I wanted. But, no you are selfish and want me to stay and love you even though that is not what I want.
When you want to go bowling with one of your guy friends and he tells you he has a date and can’t go, you would like for him to go but you don’t get miffed or get your feelings hurt. It's hard for me to tell you what you don't want to hear when I know you are so enthused and you will be SOOO disappointed. If you would give me the same considerations you give your guy friends and not be offended and get your feeling hurt, I might go out with you.
