I am pretty socially isolated, and I don't really have any friends. I suppose I'm a nerd in the sense that I like math, science, and such things, but I'm not at all into nerd culture.
I live by myself, and basically work for myself, and I make enough money to pretty well without working too hard. For the most part, I like programming the computer, studying things, researching things and other more or less solitary activities. I suppose my interests could be characterized as scholarly to an extent.
However, I'm still human and I get a bit lonely. I want some sex, and some sort of a relationship. To some extent, I'm a bit shy, but more than that I'm just scared to really interact with other people. I'm just scared of becoming the least bit intimate emotionally or physically with anyone. Yet, I feel like loneliness will slowly destroy me.
Well you obviously do interact with people over the internet which I'd say is a step in the right direction. It's always great to start with baby steps so maybe try chat rooms about things you enjoy talking about, if you haven't already, I think they'd help to get you used to interacting with people more directly than things like this forum. Maybe find a few people you really like to talk with and do AIM so it's even more one-on-one.
Since you're smart maybe you could try to tutor children? The great thing about kids is they rarely notice if you mess up, if they do they forget quickly. If you don't like that you could try like one of those phone-line homework help or instant messaging help, that way more than you benefit and you get used to talking to people.
You could go to places where people have common interests with you and just get used to being around people, you don't necessarily have to interact but going frequently and getting used to being around people may help you get more comfortable around people until you can interact.
About being scared to become intimate with people, I'd probably see a therapist. It's the fastest route to fixing the problem.
Okay, so I'm shutting up now. Hope something I said helps. =)
I feel the same way, I'm lonely too. I'm homeschooled and have lost in touch with all my friends, I just didn't want them in my life as much as I used to think. This was all because of my addiction, I only talked to those that did what I thought I liked, now that I've recovered I'm isolated, but that's cause I kind of wanted it that way.
I don't really have a problem interacting with people though, All I could say is give you some advice on confidence, that's what helps me with not thinking low of myself, it usually helps me get what I want . Check out that article, on this website, It's called confidence central.
Make yourself look interesting by wearing a funky hat or something--If you are too afraid to approach people, maybe they will approach you if you make yourself look interesting. Then once you start talking, they kind learn about who you are and you can share your interests more comfortably.
I don't really know anything about this though, seeing as I'm a seventeen year-old Jewish boy who has never had a girlfriend.
I don't really see how a funky hat will make a difference for me. I even have girls come up to me on the street, but I'm just not comfortable dealing with people. I am also Jewish if that makes a difference. - 5 months ago
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