He asked me to marry him, we live together, been together for 5 years, but I feel that he lives only for his 21 year old son. He says that I am wrong. His son doesn't close the garage, clean his bathroom or bedroom, or sometimes himself. He doesn't do his own bills. His dad does his bills, cleans his clothes, bathroom, bedroom. They share paychecks.
His dad says when his son get married(this November)they will stop. I say this is not normal and refer to his son as limbless. How do I tell him that enough is enough? When it is just us two, we do fine, except our day is planned around his sleeping and running. Guys, I need straight up advice.
21 years old is barely a young adult these days. It sounds to me like the father enjoys helping his son, even though he may be helping more than he should. At least the son is working and contributing his income.
November is only a few months away. If you can wait for a bit longer, the problem may resolve itself.
I would tell him that either he cuts his cord with his son or you would cut the cord with him. Believe me when I tell you that things are going to get worse when the son gets married because a wife will only be his mother for so long before she will hit the road. That means he will move back in and they will have the same dynamic. Also, even while the son is married, the father will continue to mother him because marriage complicates life. You enter into new territories where decisions need to be made. The son will only rely on the father for this.
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(Age:18 to 24)
When: 4 months ago
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