well ok short version, have been dating this girl for 2 years. Relationship had been having a lot of issues, never major like cheating. But still alot. She has her baggage former anorexic. I'm jealous especially when she kept not noticing guys hitting on her in front of me and telling me they are just friendly and then admitting it when her friends told her they where. She keept adding assholes in on her myspace then when they started heavy flirting she finally would delete them, but not usually until I asked her.
Also she is a perfectionist and that created stress on her and me. Then there is one instance for example a guy in her group study group, added her on msn and myspace. Ok I meet the guy at a party and he is a total douchbag. Then he starts hitting on her on msn and myspace. She then calls me to tell me that he spent an entire day looking at her boobs and asking her friends if she had a boob job.
She wouldn't throw him out of msn and myspace, when I asked her cause she was afraid of hurting his feeling and what he would think of her. I'm her boyfriend doesn't that count more?
The thing is we have been broken up for 3 week(second breakup the other was a year ago and got back together month later).
Then started talking and meeting. She says she has worked on her issues and is all better. She has deleted all the guys of her myspace, she is meeting her friends and is willing to meet my friends.(She never did any of this before, which was boring and I wanted her to meet my friends and party with me, not just stay at home, which is nice from time to time.)
She says she has changed and sees the errors of her ways. she is a sweet girl, beautiful, funny and good with kids. But she is to trusting, doesn't seem to be a real good at telling good people from assholes. But swears that its changed.
The problem is that last time we broke up she promised all these things but things went back to normal a month later.
I have my issues, but nothing compared to hers. Except maybe a little low self esteem and jealousy(but that's under control if you don't push it.)
I don't want to get back together just because its easy and cause we are lonely.
is this a really bad idea or a good idea to give this another go?
we have been meeting up again for about a week, 6 times. She is really keen on getting back together. She is really trying to show me how she is changed. She deleted all the guys she had added while we where broken up. More physical. She gained weight and went out on the town.
Its fun and easy to meet her. It would be easy to get back together.
But I'm still skeptical. How can a person change in 3 weeks?
also I find myself still nervous about her myspace and msn.
I like being with her and the physical stuff isn't bad and we have fun. But still I'm not as keen as when we got back together the first time.
Also she promised all these changes last time what's to say she has changed this time?
well I'm sure she didn't mean to go back to her old ways. I'm sure that she just got comfortable and didn't worry about them or maybe she needs more support to get over the issues it can be hard to get over them on her own y'know?
also I think if she realized that she could lose you due to these issues she would realize what is more important. she looks like she's trying so give her some support!
There is no guarantee that she's changes because yes, it's only been a short period of time. Basically you have to look at her faults and see if she is still worth being with. Are her faults so bad that you'd rather be without he? Also if you two do get back together make ground rules. Tell her up front that the adding guy's to myspace and msn has to stop. It may sound harsh but, being friends with the opposite sex is only going to bring down you're relationship quicker. Good luck!
Well tell her clearly what hurts you and what are her limits before you go back. If she agrees for that go ahead. Else better not. Give her one more chance and see
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