She's been in love with another guy all along

I think a good starting place for you is to let go of worrying about competing and winning the girl. As Tyler Durden says, "Losing all hope is freedom." I think you're probably down on yourself because of your past troubles with the ladies. But I say let it go for a while. Life is full of good things, but you won't notice them if you are worrying about what doesn't work for you. Are women nice to have around? Sometimes, but sometimes they are (just as men are) a nuisance and a hassle. Being in a relationship doesn't guarantee that you'll be happier than you are single (I'm sure at least one married friend can confirm that for you).

I think the best way to avoid being bitter is to take some time to yourself and ease up on the burden you're placing on yourself. Being bitter about some girl you know causes some irritation, but being bitter toward yourself is way worse. Step back and go easy on yourself for a while. Allow yourself some room to feel good and then build on whatever is good for you.

AND I'M NOT SAYING BE JUST LIKE JAMIE FOXX. It's what he said. AND, WITH AN ATTITUDE LIKE THAT, what can you expect women to expect from you.

It's not about making millions, and being famous. It's about being successful at whatever you do. Do it, with ambition. Whether it's your jobs, hobbies or whatever. Get ready for success, and look for opportunities to advance. Ride that wave for as long as it suits you, then get ready for the next wave.

As for comedy, it's a natural ice breaker. Mix it in with your flirting. Tease the girl a little bit if you got to. And be confident, but stay a little humble. Let your insecurities go, or make changes about them. Now, If a beautiful woman goes out for the night, and a hundred guys hit on her, which guys are going to stick out in her mind? Maybe 5 of them were handsome but not interestingly funny. The guy who was confident funny and humble, made her day by making her laugh and seeing her for more than "Hey baby, whats your number." You took the time to notice something about her and you had the confidence to critique it. Because at the end of the day it's the little things that are going to separate you from all the rest. Not every girl can date Jamie Foxx, he's only one man. So where are you going to make a difference in a girls heart?

You said "Anything that I currently have that I would think is pretty cool isn't enough to get any women interested. I compete, but I always lose against these other guys." - This stuff is MATERIALISTIC. That's provider type stuff. Now you can be a lover or a provider. And if you have a friend who is like this, go out with him and watch what he does to attract women. Or find a friend who is like this, maybe at work. There are always little things you can do to better yourself. Also look at some things like your body language, and the way in which you flirt. What needs to stay and what needs to go. Read a little bit about it, google it. Then get out there and do.

I definitely agree with lovebird01. She saw potential in you and sometimes an attitude like you described can creep into your mind while you were dating, and she sensed this. So she brought up other guys. She might have event thought that you might be the one to make her forget about that other guy. It also could of been that the relationship was rushed.
So if I can make any suggestions... Jamie Foxx wrote " Ride your success's like waves, not rockets." Start setting minor goals that are accomplishable and build on that. Keep that confidence and feeling of achievement as your attitude.

He also wrote "Being a southern gentleman gives you a set of rules to live by. You straiten' up. You're respectful. It makes people say - I like the way he carries himself."

Also, as for competing against the other guys... being funny and just overall fun to be with. Make the girl want to be with you and not riding in your car or anything materialistic like that. Study funny people and funny situations. If you can make her day by making her laugh, well then you might have something on the other guy who may be dull and boring but he's handsome... so if you had to choose... over and over... how you were going to be spending your time? Being Bored, or Having a good time and being entertained, on a more genuine level.

Then Jamie Foxx also said "Then get ready to ride the next wave. And watch for it. Surf or Crash and Burn."

First of all, you need to ditch that attitude. Stop underestimating yourself. How can girls see how great you are, if you always act like you're not? Don't let a bad girlfriend spoil your whole outlook on life and women. There's a girl out there for you; trust me! You just have to find her! You are a winner already. Remember that! The girl you had was the loser, for playing you like that! Forget her, and move on to someone else!