I have 4 children and my fiance works. Should he still come home and help me clean and take care of our children? He thinks just because he makes the money he shouldn't have to help. But he can go and help his friend whenever he needs help. Also, do you think that he should be looking at other girls while I'm right next to him?
Yes he should help you take care of your children.
But, looking at other girls, not a big deal. Can you honestly say that you don't look at other men? My fiance looks at other girls from time to time.doesn't bother me in the least because hey, I'm the one that's marrying him.
Are the 4 children his? He should definitely pitch in a bit. At least load the dishwasher or put out the garbage. Sounds like he knows you need him, so he'll pretty much do whatever he wants until you let him know how serious you are. You need to decide if these are things you can tolerate. If they aren't, then you need to decide your next plan of action: A sit down, true heart to heart, I. E. I feel really hurt when you ogle other women in front of me; I. E. Sweetie, I appreciate when you help me do small things. Can you grab this garbage bag really quickly and set it outside? ; or Counseling; or live in two separate residences and gain back your independence; lastly, if you tried everything else and if it becomes intolerable, then perhaps you should break off the engagement and take your chances finding someone that is more compatible with you.
Yikes. Sounds like the guy is not 100% committed to being in this relationship for the long haul. Not sure if he is the children's father, but if not, he is about to have "instant family", with lots of financial responsibility. Sometimes in unique situations like this it might be helpful to seek counseling. NOT BECAUSE anything is wrong, but just to have someone walk you through the upcoming lifestyle changes that are imminent once married. Perhaps he has already lived with you and the kids for a while and it's no big deal, but if he is "clamoring for his single life with the guys" a lot, and not focusing on the wife and 4 kids at home, it doesn't take a masters degree to see he is seeking some sort of freedom from responsibility. Communication is your best bet to a healthy relationship; whether it's the 2 of you alone, or with some help. Good luck
ladyredbone
(Age:18 to 24)
When: More than a year ago
NO it is never okay for your fiance to look at other women if he loves you no other women should ever cross his mind...it sounds like he chooses his friends over you...but at times he do probably need a break but he can help if he did HELP to make kids...why don't you get a job too so both of y'all can be equal.
I don't agree with you, tbh. At least not about the looking thing. My guys eyes can go wherever they want, mine will do the same. Cause I know who's bed he's gonna be in that night, and vice versa.
About everything else though, he's a lazy jerk. Let him come home one weekend, meet him at the door all dolled up, say, "Bye sweetheart I'm out with the girls" and let him do everything in the house while you're gone. You deserve a break - 4 months ago
Answerer
But would you like YOUR man to be fantasizing about other girls I know what you saying but still don't comment on MINES make up your own on da real. I feel like if he does look at another girl in front of you that's disrespect, he can do that own his own time and you can too I would NEVER disrespect a man by looking at another one while he's on my arm. - 4 months ago
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