SHOW her don't TELL her

She's just NOT that into you!

what happened?

If your girl broke up with you because you couldn't afford to party all the time, you need to really think about the entire relationship. You shouldn't have to be a party animal just to show her you can have a good time. there are plenty of things to do that are fun without spending a lot of money. It sounds like she is a "fair weather" girl. I know you believe you love her, but what about her? does she love you? If you start doing things just to prove you can party , but its not what you really want, you will start to resent her and things will be worse.

have you invited her to go hang out with you? make plans to do some things and invite her. but that is a weird reason to break up with a guy.

First of all, I'd have to question if you two are actually in love or in any kind of healthy relationship at all. It's fine that you both like go out and party (if that's your idea of fun)/whatever it is you do. It's not fine that she dropped you the second you stopped funding her little adventures. Seems like you're ignoring some red flags. You should not have just started paying for everything like that just because she lost her job (unless she was immediately looking for a new one as soon as she lost the old one). She dumped you because you have the kind of responsibilities that don't allow you to go out and act like some frat boy party animal? She sounds immature and not in the same place in her life as you are. So it sounds like she did you favor. She showed you that you need to move on to someone better than her.

She's clearly not interested in having fun with you anymore. She told you she's bored. If that's truly the case, then she'll only be back if she wants and if you have to pretend to be a party animal just to get her attention, what happens when things go back to normal and she finds out that you STILL aren't that party animal that she thought you morphed into? She'll just dump you again.

By the way, being aloof is not what creates desire. Well let me rephrase that. Being aloof only creates desire in people who enjoy playing games. At some point, the games need to stop and people need to be real with each other. For people like me, too much aloofness makes me go about my business to someone who's more available to me. I just wrote a guy off I was starting to like for avoiding me for weeks at a time only to act like he was interested when we'd see each other in person. Nobody has time for that crap.

What she's making clear is that if you don't become some crazy party animal, she's not interested. You just said yourself that it's not what you want to be. Don't ignore that feeling. You should not change in order for someone to love you. If you try to be something you're not, the real you will eventually come out and she'll be bored with you again. Cut this girl loose and move on without contact. Contact just prolongs the "getting over it" process and you get false hope.

She is worth sticking around, if you don't ever or have little doubt on answer this question:

If you got cancer, would she still stick around?
If she got cancer, would you stick around?

Someone once told me that 'if he wants to go let him go.' I think what my friend meant was that if something belongs to you, no matter what happens, even if you get separated for however long, you'll eventually end up together. If things don't work out then it just means that it's not meant to be. It's just a matter of you letting go or not.

To be frank, I don't think that you should take her back nor should you stick around in her life, at least for now. I mean, if she dumped you because you weren't fun, well, to me that's not really a valid reason. If she dumped you because she didn't have the same feelings for you or felt that you grew apart then that's more understandable. Anyway, that's just my opinion.

I think it's best not to take her back. What people don't realize is relationships are just about excitement. Leaving someone you're happy with for excitement is stupd. And people like that always get bored no matter what. Eventually she will be bored of the partys together every weekend... then what? If she can't realize that you were working for the two of you then she is incredibly selfish.

I'm going to be blunt and honest. If your not much of a party person, it's ok. But you shouldn't change who you are to try to get her back. She should love you for who you are no matter what. I am FAR from a party girl, but once in a GREAT while I do go out with my friends (and husband when he is home and not training or deployed) and have a few drinks and dance and enjoy myself. My husband, on the other hand, is always having soldiers over to party it up and BBQ. We both respect that the other is totally the opposite when it comes to partying. He knows I'm not big into it, and I know he is. Neither of would ever ask the other to change their ways, or even change our ways unless it was deeply hurting the other. If you want to change, that's ok. Just make sure it's what you want because later, you might end up regretting it and resenting her because you changed for her and aren't truly and genuinely happy. And be careful too. Changing for someone else can be tricky. If she's never asked you to change, than if things work out at first but start to get rocky, don't ever, EVER use the "I changed for you" line. Believe me, it's very hurtful and totally and completely not fair. Not saying that will happen or you'll do that. But, me and my husband are total opposites so we've had to deal with this issue a few times til we figured out how to work things :)

Do something romantic for her to let her know you really miss her and love her like send her flowers to her job or send her a love letter, but don't over due it. or after wrk when she gets off, have a picnic set up with fruit, make it look creative with like whip cream, peaches, straw berries and make it colorful. that is how you can impress her.

It really doesn't matter how much you miss her. Dump that material girl as fast as you can. If you can't see that she was only using you, then go ahead a be miserable. I suggest that you find something she left behind. Take it to her a tell her you wanted to drop it by before you took off on that Cruise with your new girlfriend. Nothing fixes a broken heart like finding someone new. This is a lesson learned. Just don't make the same mistake twice. You want to be aloof? You need to be unavailable.

Maybe she will, maybe she won't, but she won't come back as long as she thinks you're waiting for her, since she has no reason to.

Nothing makes a man aloof like a new girl or two. Start moving on.

If you two have to go out, spend tons of money, and party to enjoy each other then it's not a healthy relationship. You don't have to spend money to be happy together. I'd focus on what you two have in common because if she's enjoying life without then that's not a good sign for you. I would sit down and talk with her, games don't do much for a real relationship.