Alright, so I'm currently dating this sweet guy who totally loves me and takes care of me and is like my best friend. But that's the problem he's like my best friend. I know I love him but I don't know if I have any passion for him yet he has tons for me even though I may not think of this as true love we have a strong relationship so far.
The issue is this other guy, he is my dream guy and he recently broke up with his long time girlfriend. And when I mean dream guy I don't mean crush I mean I used to wait for this moment I used to like cry inside when he was with this other girl. Everything about him was amazing to me his eyes, his voice, the way he walked, his smile, everything and back then I was invisible to him. And back then knowing I could never ever possibly be with him I decided to go out with my current boyfriend. So here I am dating my boyfriend having a relationship totally forgetting about my little fantasies my dream guy single now starts talking to me ironically, he starts telling me his deepest thoughts, he starts smiling at me from across the room, he starts sitting with me in every class, he stares at me when he thinks I'm not looking everything I ever wanted is happening. And today during dance lessons I was partnered with him and he was breath taking holding my hands in his staring deep into my eyes intoxicating me with his smell and his low romantic voice I know I'm in love with him and I feel passion for him and I know it sounds like an infatuation but he is a good guy, smart, handsome, romantic amazing. My problem is he's scared to get close to me even when we're walking in the halls or just anything in general. My question is: If you were in this situation what would you do? Your dream guy flirts with you all the time and you're totally in love but your best friend is on the other side?
One of the toughest questions I have read on this forum. If you were married (and possibly older), my answer would be completely different, but here goes:
I can only answer this from the 2 guy's perspectives. Your question does not tell me how long you have been dating your current boyfriend, but I will assume 6 months or less. If you were to decide to call it off with your current boyfriend, it will hurt him considerably, but ultimately in the end, he will get on with life (still young with plenty of available time and girls to choose from). Tell him that you have too much respect for him as a friend/lover/significant other to go behind his back and give this "Dream Guy" a try. Tell him you would much rather be up-front about it rather than having him find out about it from others or on his own. You can always pull that "I just want to be friends" crap, but I would (and so should he) respect you more for being honest. If your current boyfriend was really a true best friend, he would already have known or suspected your feelings for Mr. Dream Guy all along, and would probably be more understanding about it than most boyfriends. With that in mind, and if things don't go totally out of control, you could even assuage his hurt feelings and suggest that if Mr Dream Guy turns out to be a jerk or something, and you guys break up, then you would offer yourself (do a little crawling and eat some crow) as available to him again for good. Mr. Right usually only comes around once a lifetime, so at your age and in this stage of your life, you don't want to miss him calling on you. Keep in mind, that there is probably a 95% chance that your current boyfriend will not take you back if things do not work out with Mr. Dream Guy. Hopefully, you could at least still be friends, but I have to tell you from experience that when you love someone and they crap on you to date someone else, the friendship thing would be the last thing I would want from you. Good luck. Again, very tough question. Also, if you have been dating longer than 6 months, the above answer does not apply.
Well If I was in your situation I wouldn't stick together with somebody If I wasn't into him. If there's no connection between you and him that your feeling then there is NO connection. Talk to the guy that you are currently with and tell him what's up? Then see if something happens with the guy that you like. But only do that if your sure your just not infatuated with him and that you really only see your current boyfriend as just as friend.
(Age:18 to 24)
When: 7 months ago
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