I wear very heavy black makeup. (note my pictures) I was recently talking with a old friend of mine whom is several years older than me. He says to me that my makeup could be scaring off guys. I honestly don't really understand what he meant by that. I doubt it's the cliche "gothic" thing because I do not fit into that stereotype really. And I am not a fan of stereotypes at all. I believe that they should stay in high school.
Anyways, explain how my heavy look could be scaring away guys. Please and thank you.
Probably a biased person here but I like your make up. You have bright eyes so dark eye make up really brings them out. As far as the whole depressed emo bull forget about it. You like your style. That's all there is to it.
I might be a bit weird, but here goes. 1: Too much make up = turn off. (what defines too much is anyone's guess. If it looks caked on, too much).
2: This might just be me, but I get turned off at any female that uses anti-aging stuff. Why? Because it's not real. It's all fake gunk and any effect is only in the mind of the beholder. There's like 2 or 3 anti-wrinkle creams that work, and all 3 are prescription only (you have to see a doctor), because they work in the dermis level. So anyone buying anti-aging crap I consider to be incompatible with me... to put it nicely. (I'm a nerd and a sucker for science).
My Girlfriend wears occasionally make up to look nice, mostly a light blush and a natural looking lippy, but that's pretty rare. Most of the time she doesn't wear a thing. :P
PS. From your picture you look fine with what make up you have on.
First of all you look very pretty and guys like when there girl gets all dolled up...but I think most guys like a girl with the least amount of make-up on as possible... I don't want to wake up to something scary in the morning lol or not know who she is cause I have never seen her without it ...
And girls sometimes do not know when they cross that line... :/ - 2 months ago
Answerer
But then again, goths wear a lot of it anyway, so I guess it depends on the style... there are a lot of factors that determine if it is too much on a girl but I guess makeup isn't nice to ur faces through time since you use so much. - 2 months ago
Question Asker
Yes there is, I do agree. I see it on other people just not myself. Strange eh? - 2 months ago
well to be honest your very attractive but you need to lay off the makeup. guys like girls who look like they enjoy life and with lack makeup girls kinda look like they are depresed. And just like darwin stated about woman, men want healthy happy woman who they can go somwhere with they won't start a relationship with you if they think your going to have problems ehs going to deal with down the road. I don't mean to sound like an ass but that's how the male mind works and I'm trying to get right to the point
Well, if you're over 18 you look like an immature teen. If that's the look you're going for than whatever. But you need to look like an adult if want a specific kind of guy in you age bracket. That look tells me a few things whether it's true or not. List: highly emotional, drug addict, unemployed, punk kid. Unfair, so what, that's what you're putting out. Perception is reality. It happens everywhere. So please don't be so surprised by certain reactions if you act or dress a certain way. Those things actually matter in a civilized society where appearances matter.
I think your correct. Even though it's not right or fair of people to judge, they will no matter what. So how you dress or, in this case, do your make up, is how people will perceive and judge you whether you like it or not. - 2 months ago
Question Asker
I think I liked your answer the most. Thank you. - 2 months ago
Yea don't take this too hard, but if I saw you at a party I would make a mental note to stay away. You're really pretty though so why don't you try just going out a few days without makeup and see if you notice a difference?
From your pictures, you do have a bit of a "Goth" look to an outsider, because it really is pretty thick. I'd say it's a bit intimidating to anyone who doesn't also do it. Some guys may not get a warm or approachable feeling from you. If you generally wear darker colors that might also give the impression that you don't want to be bothered.
That sort of look is cool for high school. Once you grow up you'll realize that it's really not as popular out here. Perhaps it will take some time before EVERYONE is used to it.
Lots of guys LOVE a natural look for girls. I've never been a fan of make up, it just makes things seem "fake".
To be blatantly honest with you, I would not approach a woman like that because I would attribute it to some form of mental illness such as depression, bipolar, etc. Its sort of like a big sign saying "Hi! I'm emo and cut myself when I feel down!" It may not be the actual case but it is the message your makeup is conveying.
I agree! And if some guy is going to judge you on something so relatively insignificant as how you choose to wear your make-up, then I'm betting they aren't worth it in the long run. As far as giving off a goth vibe, I think as long as you don't go overly goth with your clothing and attitude, you will be fine. "Goth" and "Emo" extend far beyond just some make-up. And what most guys want in the end is a girl who digs herself and the way she looks, heavy make-up or not. Screw the nay-sayers! - 2 months ago
Sure but it depends how her bf/friends feel around her (unless they ain't goth or whatever fashion style she is) because face it, everyone is affected by outside influence (people, media, friends, strangers even, etc...) So you know, based on common sense, I can wager her friends are mostly goth or have heavy makeup as a lifestyle so they "get along" in society together more "comfortably" in presence of others. - 2 months ago
Hence, (yes hence) the boyfriend would be indeed either into the style or is wearing it. but goth is more than a fashionstyle. - 2 months ago
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When: 2 months ago
No one else has said it, so I will: it depends on what sort of guys you are interested in.
If you're interested in squishy, timid guys with little to no spine that would be "scared off" by your appearance, then you should reevaluate what you're wearing.
If you're looking for the sort of guy that isn't intimidated by something as small as your makeup, the sort of guy that will like you for you and have the balls to talk to you without shivering, then you're just fine exactly as you are - don't change a thing. You look great.
Forget all these answers telling you that your older friend is right and that your look scares people away. The only guys it will scare off are the spineless noodles that, I'm betting, you don't want to be with anyway.
trust me, even if guys compliment it's still gross because it's not natural, why would a girl as pretty as you hide her face in "heavy" make up! the more experienced guys and wiser ones understand two things: the girl is either ugly and wants to hide her face and her facial features no matter how... or that she has complexities that no one can work them thru with her... So! girls please, for the love of all the religions and the nations and the creatures give us a break and look natural because those things you put on your faces and nails are really disgusting, you are a human being and not an alien!
we want to see some beauties with our own eyes not weird eye sights that will give us nightmares!
I'm totally used to it... my brother used wear dark eye makeup ala Captain Jack from pirates fame. But some men simply equate it with 'goth' and want nothing to do with it or the culture. You may not be a fan of stereotypes, but they exist nonetheless. It's something we just have to deal with and work towards eliminating the stereotype. That takes time.
As long as your happy and comfortable with yourself, you will attract those who have similar traits. But you can't change the way certain people will react and it would be naive to think otherwise. Some guys will instinctively think about how their mother will react if they bring you home :) it happens. YES we are not all pigs and ass's and do consider our parents when courting a woman.
Hope all this rambling helps. Good luck and cheers!
i think it depends on the girl really on whether or not it "scares" people off but is suits some girls and from you picture your one of those girls but it does look a bit gothic-esque maybe your just looking at the wrong sort of guys
I am afraid it IS the gothic thing. You may not like it, but everyone makes subconscious evaluations based on looks. Your thick makeup makes you seem intense and serious, as well as a bit antisocial due to the style's counter-culture history. If that isn't who you are, then think about altering your style. Doing just the top eyelids and/or just by the eyelashes can make it more stylized and sexy, while still bringing focus to your pretty blue eyes.
Heavy makeup actually scares some guys. It kinda makes you look trashy or emo which most guys think emo girls are creepy. I actually prefer light makeup on a girl. Take some of it off let your TRUE beauty shine through. Makeup is fake but your features are real. Show them off. What are you masking behind there? There's nothing to hide let others see your face :)
I love how it takes six hours to get the first down vote, but when you have that one vote you'll get a dozen more in just one hour. Tells you something about how people operate. - 2 months ago
Or it could've just taken that long for more people to read your answer :P
I'm not voting you down, but I don't agree with your answer at all. It's a huge assumption to make, and it's pretty ridiculous. I'm fairly certain that's why most people voted you down. - 2 months ago
It could be. It depends on what kind of guy you're going for, most likely. I think your makeup is too intense. It's so severe that it distracts from how pretty you are, and you really do have lovely eyes. You should try to soften it. Don't get me wrong. I love playing with makeup. Dark, colorful, elaborate, whatever. You obviously love your dark eye makeup, but I think there's a better way to do it, so that it enhances your eyes, but is still a style you feel comfortable with. You'd benefit from some practice as well, particularly in blending. I think what you're doing now looks a bit sloppy. Something like these would be infinitely more flattering on you:
The fact of the matter is that people judge based on appearance. But if someone is going to write you off completely because of how you wear your makeup, you probably don't want them anyway. I don't think you need to give up your dark makeup, you should just improve your technique. Play with it, have fun with it!
It depends on how you put your make-up on. If you put up make-up to HIDE your face. It will look like that. If you put on make-up to accentuate your natural beauty, it will look wonderfull. The make-up you wear... it doesn't suit you. You look like, sorry to say, an emo kid. I think you have a very cute face, but you should either change the way you make up yourself, or just let it be.
Your eye makeup is *really* intense, and it doesn't look natural at all, which is what guys usually prefer to see. Honestly, it's the first thing a person is going to notice when they look at you. Not necessarily your eyes (which are really nice, by the way), but your eye makeup.
I'm not a huge fan of Avril Lavigne, but she always did the same thing. Here's a picture of her with heavy eye makeup: link And here's a picture with it toned down: link
See the difference? In the first one, it's like the dark makeup is just there, it's not really accentuating anything, which is the purpose of makeup. In the second one, she's actually highlighting her eyes, and with less makeup. It makes such a huge difference in her appearance.
ohk...first off, you don't look like you wear like ALOTTA LOTTA dark makeup. I think you're pretty nd plus, who the hell wants to be wit a guy whos shallow enuff to judge based solely on something as ridiculous as how much makeup you wear neways? don't change for anybody and one day, there'll b that one guy who won't give a damn how much dark makeup you wearr
Going from your pictures you have gorgeous eyes! You are definitely on the right track with wearing eye make-up to accentuate them, but I feel that all of the heavy black is too much and a little too harsh on your skin, and might therefore be a turn-off.
My advice is to still wear eye make-up but opt for browns instead of all black. Here's some examples of some looks you might like to try. link link link
Maybe its because she was on drugs at the time lol - 2 months ago
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When: 2 months ago
it might be that you put makeup on like the dude next to you, thus making you look like a dude. try putting on heavy makeup in a way that's flattering!
Actually, NONE of my friends wear makeup...only me. Expect Austin and he only did that because I begged....LOL. - 2 months ago
Answerer
Well drawing circles around your eyes just makes you look like a raccoon. I know emo and goth girls who know how to put on beautiful makeup that doesn't look like crap. - 2 months ago
Nah its not scary... its more.............. ha ha funny to me lol. like they want to grab peoples attention because they lacked it as a child, or because of negative views on life, poor social standings and etc. they choose a path that expresses darkness, sadness, anger... negative emotions that are not at all optimistic or positive (barely.)
we all got styles, but I don't have a need to show myself as a rebel, a deviation to the norm of society to feel like an individual. - 2 months ago
It probably does but you can still fix it! Without stop doing what you like, I would say that if you only would wear eye liner on your top and bottom inner eye lid it would look bettter and some good mascara, it could be that you even use a lot of it, itwill give you a dark look, but not that dark, and you will still look pretty (= without scaring guys away if that's what you afraid of. Byt the way you have sum nice eyes. I hope this helps try it out if you don't like it just be you ;]
i don't think it's your style that scares off guys, I don't even think you are 'scaring' guys off... but you aren't exactly achieving the look correctly to enhance your beauty. instead of just drawing black circles around your eyes, you should try some of the tips on that site.
The problem is it doesn't look natural. There is a way to wear more make up but it look natural. I wear a mineral foundation, light eyeliner, mascara, and the occassional very light eyeshadow (I buy the expensive stuff to bring out the green in my eyes but still looks natural). My husband loves it because it brings out my natural look and doesn't look like I'm wearing all kinds of make-up
Well from what I understand...guys don't like when girls wear a ton of makeup. Most guys even prefer girls when they think they look their worst so no makeup lol. By you wearing heavy black makeup they could be getting the wrong impression of you maybe being that you don't respect yourself or that you're a mean girl, not saying you apply to either of those. But a first impression is everything!
Lol I don't find it intimidating... its just unattractive when a girl wears too much of anything. :/
i have a story. I was with a girl one night long time ago, met at a bar, we hooked up, I remember her wearing quite abit of makeup and we were "sweating" haha and yeah, anyways, we both spent the night at her place, in the morning, she took a shower and then I noticed she was a completely different person. Now that scared me.
girls shouldnt have to wear so much as to become a different person. - 2 months ago
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When: 2 months ago
yea I really think it could scare away guys. there is this girl at my school & she piles on the black mascara & eyeliner & she's so scarry looking! it makes her eyes look so unfortunate looking! so try not to wear it!
Well aren't you just a ray of sunshine. But thank you for your opinion - 2 months ago
Answerer
Lol no I meant you have BEAUTIFUL EYES. the black is kinda dark and makes you un approachable like you'll rip through my soul if I speak to you.. ughh shiverrs - 2 months ago
i also wear dark makeup. it scares away some men because they know from looking at us that we are our own person, and don't need to be like every one else. and some men are intimadated by that.
Then go for the natural look if you're ur own person. Don't try to be so darkkkk because everyone knows ur not.. its not mysterious or anything either. Its just like you got a lot to hide and ur afraid of showing it so you have this mask on - 2 months ago
Answerer
Because guys think there large and incharge - 2 months ago
Being on the outside, and someone who used to cake on makeup, it doesn't send that message in any way. It sends the message that your trying too hard to be that way, and makes it seem immature. And wearing super dark make up and a lot clearly sends a message that you are very unhappy with the way you look, so you try really hard to change that. THAT is what guys don't want. They want someone with confidence and happy with their looks and not so into their looks. - 2 months ago
No what intimidates us about it is the fact that it may be a telltale sign of emotional instability such as depression or bipolar or something like that. there's a reason you only see people who look like that working dead end jobs such as cashiers at your local cd exchange or starbucks. - 2 months ago
How is wearing your make-up dark a "telltale sign" that someone is emotionally unstable? I wear my make-up pretty dark and I am not in the last bit depressed, nor am I bipolar! And I don't have a dead end job either. I think that if a guy is scared off by your make-up then is to a wimp and wasn't good enough for you. - 2 months ago
Then why feel the need to slather on so much that you nolonger look like yourself? If you're SOOOO confident with who you are then just BE who you are and stop trying so hard to look like a clown. - 2 months ago
Answerer
Some people just like there makeup like that. I like the way I look with it. - 2 months ago
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Well its been a month but I wanted to add to WeaponZero. I'm depressed and bipolar and I go to all these meetings and all the people there look so normal and also not all goth/emos end up working a deadbeat job. I see teachers and doctors at the cyber goth/goth bars. so don't be so quick to judge darlin - A month ago
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