My ex is with someone else but wants to keep in touch with me. Will he ever come back?
A year and half ago I've been with this guy for 5 months, he was separated but not divorced yet. We live 2 hours apart and used to see each other every weekend/or two weekends. The relationship faded, something went wrong and he came up with the "too much too soon" excuse. We really believed in the relationship, the chemistry was 1000% and we wanted to get closer to have more time to spend together. Eventually it ended. He was not ready for it. We kept in touch and at some point I took a 2 months break from him after which he told me that he missed me, that he was thinking to come back with me and that he wondered whether in those two months I was thinking about him. Now he has someone else who lives in his town, he's not in love but he likes her a lot. This sucks!
We decided to be friends but today I told him I can't be friend with him since he always comes up with something he says that makes me upset.
Now he's away for work, far from everyone, he'll be back in May, I just can't forget him and it seems like he doesn't have clear ideas about what he wants. He said he takes things day after day.
He told me that maybe things in the future could be better between us, he always gave me hopes and I don't know whether I should be happy about that or not. All he wants is to take things slowly but it seems like in his head there's printed that I want to commit which is not what I want if he's not ready. He seems he cares for me but I know I should move on. I know he problem is the distance bcs if I lived close by maybe today we would have still been together since things would have been taken differently.
What do you think, will he ever come back with me?
What do I have to do?
What's Your Opinion?
Most Helpful Opinion
Keywords: "...BUT I KNOW I SHOULD MOVE ON." There's your answer.
IF HE WANTED TO BE WITH YOU, HE'D BE WITH YOU. No question about it...men hide behind this "I don't know" thing, thinking that you're gullible enough to fall for the lie. They know what they want, and it looks like he wants to date around and keep you as a "friend," so when he's sick of the next girl, he can come back to you and you'll be there waiting.
And HE'S MARRIED?!? ugh...so he probably has done the exact same thing to his wife.
Girl, leave him alone and let him clean up his life: get the divorce (because there'll NEVER be a future with a married man), and figure out if he's ready for a relationship and if it's with you. Otherwise, you're just getting used.
What Guys Said 2
You need to see what's in it for you? Pain, dissapointment, heartache or something so good that it's too hard to let go. Only you can decide this, but if he is always saying that he's thinking of you and in the future there may be a chance for the both of you, then you need to walk away now!
He lays down with someone else but thinks of you? That says it all Ithink..
If you wanted to be with someone then you would, it's simple.. being at a distance would not matter as it's just geographical, and it's a temprary thing.
The part that caught my attention was "but I know I should move on". You answered your own question. He is just coming out of a marriage, was he cheating while married? If he was, he's a player, he'll never be satisfied with one woman. Let him know that if you lived close to each other you could give the relationship a shot, but that this long distance relationship does not work for you.
What Girls Said 5
my advice is to not wait on this guy. move on with your life. be happy and just take care of yourself and honestly if I were you, I wouldn't count on him coming back. he's with someone else. the first thing that would come to my mind if I was in this situation is what are they doing? probably hooking up and...that would turn me off from returning to any ex boyfriend.