On one way I feel anxiety not to check his profile, but for the other I think I could feel worse... I just want to forget that loser but he's stuck in my mind and we broke up in December... Omg help!
- Definitely noVote A
- YesVote B
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Please don't feel guilty for distancing yourself after they said really nasty things to you. A drug addiction is no excuse for being a mean person. I realize they are probably going through a rough time. But it's up to them to want to get help. No one can force them to change, and if they are choosing to follow that path and not seek out help, there isn't much you can do.
If you feel like checking his profile, and worry about him, that's reasonable. But it's not a good idea to keep trying to find out what he is doing with his life.
You need to move on. There is no reason to reply to someone when they say nasty things to you. You are not obligated to return a response.
The best thing to do is move on. You can't heal someone with an addiction, they must choose to seek out help. Unless he is willing to do that, you don't need to be in his life.
The thing is, people with addictions are sick, and they often lash out and hurt people in their circle. Though they need love and support when they are seeking treatment. It's not really good to allow yourself to be abused by them when they are in the throws of the addiction. Especially if they are lashing out at you. Continuing to let them into your life without creating boundaries is just allowing the addiction to continue. That is why on the show intervention the people sit in the circle and basically say either get help or don't contact me ever again. If they let the person come into and out of their life, and allow them to mistreat them (ie. stealing money, being mean, etc...) the cycle of addiction is able to continue, they are helping to enable the situation.
I dated a guy once who was addicted to alcohol. He was in treatment but not really following the steps and advice that were given to him. He was emotionally abusive and caused me a great deal of stress. The thing is, if someone is mistreating you, it's good to set up healthy boundaries. As mean as it sounds, their addiction is not your responsibility. And as much as you want to help them, you also have to take care of yourself first. If they are lashing out and making you feel bad, then the relationship between you two, whether it be romantic or just as friends isn't worth it.4
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