HELP? How to start moving on after a breakup?

Hi everyone! I hesitated a lot before posting something here but looks like I could really use some advice.
My guy who I was very in love with left me when I found out he had a girlfriend of 9(!) years in his homeland. I found that out accidentally and was crushed. I told him, to which he said that what he felt for me was real but it would be "healthier" not to talk anymore. It all happened over text because I was very very far away at that moment so I never met him in person after the breakup. We live in different countries so I just didn't come back. I was laying in bed crying for a month until the semeter began.
I's been almost a year now and I haven't moved on one bit. I've been on anti depressant but they aren't really doing much. I can't sleep at night analyzing things like it all happened yesterday. I start randomly crying when I see things that remind me of him. The feeling of pain is still fresh although it's been a while already. I spend most of my day in my thoughts thinking and thinking how it could have been and wondering why it happened as it has. I still love him very much and I never felt such connection with anyone, I thought he was the one! And since it ended I don't know what to do. I'm honestly going through life like a zombie taking it day by day. Im just worried that it will never end and that my life will always be like this. Why didn't he love me and why didn't he choose me over his girlfriend? I never got any answers from him and I can't get in tough with him anymore.

If anyone has gone through something similar, I'd appreciate your guys' oponions and how you got through that. Even if you don't have similar experiences, please comment!

Thank you


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What Guys Said 3

  • Stop overlooking the fact that he deceived you, and that, as a result, you are regularly dwelling on, greatly valuing, and crying over a fictitious version of himself. The person who you thought was "the one," in regards to him, does not exist.

    Considering the above, don't go it alone. Confide in someone: a friend, family member, or a trustworthy, empathetic individual. If that's not an option, then journal or, and pursue introspective, cathartic activities to express and release your troubles.

    Try new activities, new things, a new places. Avoid being alone for significant amount of periods. Get out and socialize and exercise with regularity. And, as important, give yourself more time to heal.

    "Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck."

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  • Sorry to hear that
    But I think it's time to chill and be awesome
    Right?
    So just make yourself busy doing stuffs like talking , chatting and reading etc.
    Life sucks but that doesn't means we'll waste it like that.
    Find someone who can make you feel alive 😉 lol

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  • Well sorry I found only one way effective its serious "when you can't push him out find a reason to hate him" and its very evident "WHo on this planet earth would have g. f of 9 years I mean its crazy he is animal" its better you left him.

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    • I found it insane too! I was shocked. I wonder why they haven't gotten married yet

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