Im so embarrassed. please help me?

how do I move on past the feeling of being a crazy ex girlfriend? my boyfriend cheated on me and I went crazy. I did so many creepy things, logging into his accounts, creating fake profiles to follow him, texting him from fake numbers, and he found out about all of them. now that I've taken a step back, I realize how wrong and creepy this was. how can I move on from this and not feel so embarassed? Im afraid for the rest of his life he will remember me as the crazy ex girlfriend...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He cheated on you so in my opinion he deserves everything he gets. A while back I thought my girlfriend (at that time) was acting a little strange... I had a feeling she had somehow met someone... she came back from a 2 day trip with one of her (girl) friends and she had some roses which she said she bought from a market, and proceeded to use my vase to keep them safe etc.

    While she was in the shower, and even though I didn't want to, I caved in to the urge to look on her phone and check her messages. I saw messages between her and a guy [we'll just call him Bob] and it seems that she'd met him in a bar and he gave her the flowers the next day before she came back.

    When she got out the shower I asked her 'so... who is 'BOB'?, and why did you say the roses are from the market?' she immediately burst out crying and said she was sorry (even though the texts showed that she planned to go on a date with him at some point).

    I told her to call him up immediately (in front of me) and tell him that she has a boyfriend and that she made a mistake meeting him and accepting flowers from him. When she refused, I took the phone and called him myself, telling him that if he came near her I would make him pay dearly'... you could say what I did was also crazy but you know what? When someone crosses you like that... sometimes you have to take action (to be clear I wasn't actually going to do anything, it was just for show to scare her into not doing this again - I'd rather she broke up with me than cheat on me).

    Anyway... yeah.. I think you went a little too far, after you found out he cheated on you you could just break up with him if you couldn't trust him anymore. But I do understand you 75% and 25% think you went too far.

    Either way, he's your ex who CHEATED ON YOU so I wouldn't even worry about what he thinks. He's scum to you, keep it that way.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Hahaha that was creepy but we all have done something embarrassing with people we have or had a crush on.
    But now, think about it. It is in the past, what you did, it's done now and you have no power to change that even if you wanted to. You just need to accept what you did. You either work on getting over it or you will let it stress you for the rest of your life. So whenever you remember it say to yourself "it's done, i can't change it actually it is no big deal" he may remember you as creepy but he will not be wasting his time thinking about that. Eventually it will feel less and less embarrassing, and be sure it won't kill you. And don't try to apologize with him you know because... it may will make things more embarrassing, just don't give a crap about it and it will be fine

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What Guys Said 3

  • Accept that you did these things in the midst of an extremely emotional and confusing period of time, and let it be the past. Learn from it, use it to become a better person in the future, and let it go.
    Hanging on to it won't do you any good, you can't go back and change anything, so let it go. Drop it. Take the backpack full of regrets or embarrassment and move on.
    He wasn't innocent either, and I think that you probably reacted how a lot of people going through that experience would have. Not saying it's right or wrong, but you're probably not that crazy given the circumstances.

    Even if you're remembered (by him) as the crazy ex-girlfriend, he's still the asshole boyfriend who cheated on his girlfriend, so don't beat yourself up too much.

    And please, don't feel like all guys are going to be like him, either.

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  • "I realize how wrong and creepy this was."

    That is step 1 towards moving on. Since he cheated on you, why do you really care what he thinks? There's nothing you can really do about it now but learn from your mistakes and not repeat them should you run into a similar situation in the future.

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  • I'm accepting crazy ex applications at the moment. Please fax them to 1-800-DEADPOO, I think we would get along just fine. One thing do you know how to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches?

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What Girls Said 4

  • Well you you have already admitted your fault and I hope you learn your lesson. Dont be too hard on yourself, everyone has done something crazy at least once in their lives. I was a crazy girlfriend too and I did worse than what youve done. I just didn't get caught but we all have to move on. I know you are super bummed right now and you feel bad but he is out of the picture and it doesn't matter. If he didn't give you a reason to then you wouldn't got through all of that

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  • Well since you see that the behavior was wrong you are not crazy. You got very hurt and acted irrationally which can happen. As long as you don't revert back to that just move on

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  • Been there and done that... unfortunately it can't be undone.
    Give yourself a break and stop reliving it.

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  • Stop caring. Ignore him, forget about him... we've all done crazy stupid stuff when in love. Love doesn't have to be sane, how boring would that be? You learned your lesson and now you know you shouldn't do that... that's good! People aren't born perfect, we just have to fight to be a little bit better as we grow. Don't talk to him anymore but don't avoid him either, just learn to simply not care about him. I know it's easier said than done - I am currently in love with my ex and I struggle every day not to contact him because I know that's what's best for both of us... but you know? It really does get easier every day and I know that with time, I'll forget about him and so will you. So be strong, stop thinking about the past, and learn to love your mistakes because they will make you be who you really want to be.

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