Is it wrong to look up exes and compare oneself to the new significant other?

In fact, I already know the answer, but I feel this is confession time.

I had not even thought about her much until some putz in my circle mentioned that she was engaged last year and moved to Italy with her fiancee/husband.

So, I looked them up and I must say that I was a bit surprised. My ex still looked cute, but I was not impressed by the dude at all. I think a lot of us guys imagine that our exes end up with a Brad Pitt (unless I am wrong in that assumption?) and I must admit that I found myself smirking when I saw the pics. He seemed shorter than me, with a lot less hair, an yellowier teeth.

I know, I know, all this ver, very shallow. This guy could have money, a great personality, a hugh schlong, or simply clicks with my ex in a way she and I never did.

But, can't I gain a teensy, weensy satisfaction from the fact that she didn't end up with Brad Pitt and that I at least some attributes on this guy?

By the way, I do have a beautiful girlfriend now so there is yet another layer of irrationality to this mix.

Thanks for the thoughts and perspectives.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes stop doing that! STOP IT!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Honestly, it's fine, but a bit unhealthy for your relationship. The way I see it, any opportunity to put a smile on your face, without hurting someone else, is an opportunity that you should take. She isn't hurt by the fact that you're happy that she isn't marrying Adonis - as long as you don't tell her that, of course.
    However, out of respect for your current girlfriend, focus your attention on her. An Ex is the past. You can either dwell on her, or focus on the present and future.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Hell no... you have to see if they upgraded or downgraded... with social media the temptation is just too much

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  • i mean, do you still have feelings for the ex? or u now love the new girlfriend

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  • I always compare myself to my current bfs ex's. But I personally think he's struck lucky with me ;)

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  • No i dont think its wrong and i have done it , keeping tabs to see if they are really happy or not

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What Guys Said 1

  • Yes it is.

    Do I still do it? Yep

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