How to move on after 7 months?

He hurt me really badly... he lied a lot and towards the end of the relationship suspected him of cheating (texting with girl) then he acted on it but eventually left her. He texted me for Valentine's day and constantly would bicker to my friends about things i posted on insta since we have mutual friends. Then weeks after one bickering event he started dating this girl who liked him for years. A month and a few days after he had sex with her. Something i didn't give in with him. He admitted that since i didn't let him in there was no point in staying to my friend. For their grad, he saw me from behind and ended up running away leaving his girlfriend behind. He doesn't post many pics of her on insta as he did with me. My friend follows him on snap. He posts a lot of snaps of bed sheets and sexualized things with her. My friend says he's using her and he doesn't love her. But regardless it hurts. Its been 7 months already! I hate him but part of me still feels for him. But everything he did and does hurts me. I just came back from a trip... GOD i want this to end.


0|0
210

Most Helpful Guy

  • "Its been 7 months already! I hate him but part of me still feels for him. But everything he did and does hurts me. I just came back from a trip... GOD i want this to end."

    Fall in love with *something* (not someone because you'll rebound). It could be your career, your studies, your hobbies, dancing lessons, fitness, art, creating music, reading, get a cuddly pet, network out and make as many friends as you can so you always have a full calendar, whatever.

    That'll speed things up. You need something to wake up for that excites you, pushing him further and further to the back of your time. Time doesn't fix this, falling in love with other things does.

    0|0
    0|0
    • pushing him further and further to the back of your time [/mind].

    • Get a makeover, reinvent yourself, try new things, broaden your horizons.

    • Thanks for the advice and yeah I don't like the idea of rebounding; despite the fact that he is. I never thought about falling in love with something. Yeah I am trying to fill up my calendar and find a job.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I guess if you really want to forget him. It is best to distance yourself from anything related to him first, and to surround yourself with those who are truly supportive of you and your well-being. Perhaps, you could let your friend know that you do not want to know anything more about him too, and be firm about it.

    Cry out your pain, express it, in any art form that you enjoy and all, even writing in a journal helps. At least it will be much better than keeping it all inside. Let yourself have a short period of feeling these emotions, like perhaps you could give yourself a month to grief and slowly move on from the pain, and be patient with yourself throughout this process too. After that, move on from it, pick yourself up again, and do things that makes you happy and fulfilled again. You can make yourself happy, without needing someone else to do that for you.

    In the future, when you're stronger, if possible try to forgive him too, not because he deserves forgiveness, but because, when you blame him, you're allowing him to "hurt" you all over again, by wanting to hurt him back in this way. Do it for you.

    0|0
    0|0

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 9

  • snapchat... instagram... and facebook..

    the bane of society.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Have you found another guy to make you happy?
    I think you should try to not focus on him
    I think you need to remember who this guy is, how he treats people
    He downer sound good for anyone
    It's sad but people can't be helped if they don't want it
    Open yourself, find a good man

    0|0
    0|0
  • it takes up to a year to move on from someone. there is nothing you can do but go on by day by day until the brain finishes from grieving.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Sounds like a jackass you shouldn't waste your time on.

    Only thing he has a point on is that after a while of dating, a lack of sex really builds tension which guys hate. Doesn't mean you have to spread wide, but a nice blowjob here and there is just as good as sex.

    0|0
    0|0
    • You know what's funny. I had that in mind but after a while, but he didn't wait... I mean i know couples who've lasted 5 years together and no sex. Guys have to realize sex doesn't make a relationship or make them love someone. For example his new girlfriend who she's had a crush on him for years gave him sex easily within a month. And while in a relationship with her he's still been asking about me. He's using her for sex. I just want him to realize sex doesn't equal love. We had a great relationship and he loved me without sex. But i guess his hormones got the better of him

  • You will find better. Work on improving yourself. Maybe delete him off all social media so you dont have to be reminded of him. Pick up a old passion or hobby

    0|0
    0|0
  • That's nothing. Try again in 5 more months.

    0|0
    0|0
  • he's not worth your time. You dont want him and automatically girls are attracted to what they can't have.

    0|0
    0|0
    • i know that but how do i forget about him?

    • Show All
    • No not the netflix.

      Its the netflix and your friend in common telling you about him and her sister following you and the fact that you follow him secretly.

      I know what you are going through.

      I didn't forget her girl because I still had her number, could see her profile photo, had photos of her and was still checking her out even though I wasn't talking to her.

      Then I realised I wasn't getting anywhere in life while she was enjoying life and what was done was to me. I deleted her number photos blocked her everywhere and went cold turkey indefinetely, now I like someone else and have moved on by doing this. If I see her I dont even like her anymore.

  • Cut all ties with him. Maybe start to date again.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Including netflix?
      I have dated but no guy has caught my interest

    • Show All
    • Well we have cut communication off. He texted me on Valentine's day and constantly would bicker to my friend off my insta content so i blocked him. And even now that he's in a relationship (using girl for sex) he is constantly trying to compete with me. Like when i returned from my Europe trip recently he barely posted on snap and when i was gone he would non stop. Yesterday i uploaded pics and changed profile on fb and he did too on insta and even posted a bad pic of her on insta since he barely uploads of her (like he did with me according to my friend)

    • Ask your friends to cut all ties with him.

  • Didn't read. STFU

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 1

  • He's a jackass. He's not worth your time and your pain. Be glad he's out of your life

    0|0
    0|0
    • I know, but i can't help getting thoughts of him at times. I kind of just want him to forever disappear from my mind and heart

    • Anything that helps. TIPS?

Loading...