My ex is married and we broke-up 7 years ago... why is he contacting me?

My ex and I broke-up 7 years ago, in which 2 of those years he stalked me. He was even stalking me when his (now current wife) girlfriend was living with him. It ended badly and he was very persistent in trying to get me back, even though he was the one who broke-up with me in the first place. I didn't want him back because I realized afterwards, we just weren't right for each other (and he was a jerk).

Anyways, a couple of days ago, I received a text from him just wanting to say hi, mind you, I changed my phone number years ago because of his harassment and have been unlisted. I didn't reply, but I am 100% positive it is him. I creep on his wife on fb every now and then, and they appear very happy. In fact, she seems like a real sweetheart... so why in the world is he contacting me after all this time? What is his deal? It REALLY ticks me off!!!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He is obsessed with you OP. You should probably tell his wife about this shit because this type of situation can get out of hand extremely fast. It's rather unfortunate that HE broke up with YOU, yet, you have moved on while he moved on but while still loving you. This will end badly if the wife finds out in an unfortunate manner. Best let her know quick. or tell the police or confront him yourself if you don't want all the drama.

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    • If I hear anything else from him, I have full intention of telling his wife.
      Does it make sense that the two things that bother me the most, is one- his level of respect towards me (which is null), and two, his level of respect towards his wife. I threatened him years ago to tell his then girlfriend about all of his stalking and unrelenting pursuit of me, and he finally stopped. I also insulted him very badly... not because I wanted to or wanted to hurt him on purpose, but because I figured it might knock some sense into him and have him back-off completely. Short term results...
      Thanks for your input!

    • Anytime! As for you question Does it make sense that the two things that bother me the most, is one- his level of respect towards me (which is null), and two, his level of respect towards his wife." No, It makes perfect sense to me, he has a problem and obviously is acting on impulse/desire and I've seen cases like this where it will literally destroy someones life, as I said things can get really ugly. His respect is at an all time low for both (you and his wife) he seems to be lacking that aspect. Insulting is "perhaps" not a proper way to go about, sometimes, it can have opposite impacts of what you were expecting, however, I completely understand/respect your reasoning behind it. Furthermore, You threatening him seemed to be an efficient way, if he truly cares about his wife then he shouldn't dare come to you ever again. Hopefully this guy will learn his lesson. Bonne chance, good luck OP.

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What Guys Said 2

  • His marriage is bad and he wants a backup plan

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    • Ugh that's such an insult!!(not meant towards you) To be someone's "if it doesn't work" option, is not only insulting to the person they are in a relationship with, but the person they are trying to add as the extra! It's like saying, neither person is worth their best. (not that I want his best; just saying based on principle) What a JA!

      Thanks for your reply!

  • He wants you, too.

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    • I have no respect for people like that!
      Thanks for your response!

What Girls Said 1

  • If he continues to contact you, get a restraining order.

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    • I was close to getting one last time...
      Thanks for your response!

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