Should I break up with him?

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over three months, but we've known each other for seven years. When we first started dating, everything was really good. He called me all the time, we talked pretty much every single day. It went from that to nothing. For the past few weeks, it hasn't felt like we're a couple. We don't talk much. We don't see each other as offer because of his new job, which doesn't bother me. What bothers me is the he used to make an effort, and now he doesn't. Last weekend, we both had three days off and we're going to spend the whole weekend together like we usually do every other weekend, and I got stood up. I went to his family cookout that he invited me to go with him, I ended up having to meet him there. I usually stay at his granny's house for the weekend we want to spend together, and he didn't show up at all until the day I was leaving. He barely talked to me, and he barely answered my messages. He didn't answer any of my calls. I just don't see how things could go from so good to so sour in a matter of weeks. And on top of all of this, he's leaving for the Marines boot camp in November. And he dropped a bomb on me, and he says that he doesn't believe in marriage and he doesn't want any kids. Even though that's a future decision, I feel like... as much as I like him, this relationship isn't going anywhere. Last night, after not talking to him for a few days, I messaged him and told him how I felt, and asked him if he wanted to be with me. He said he'd call me after he got off of work, and I never got a call. Not even a text. He's said a million of times before that he wanted to be with me and that he didn't want to break up... but why continue this? This isn't a relationship. Not the one I want to be in. I mean, I love him. I've always loved him for as long as I've known him, but it's upsetting me. And he doesn't act like he cares.


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  • You stayed at his grans without him there for 2 days?
    And he needs to make the effort so you really need to have the talk with him

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    • I stayed at his granny's home with his cousins and her. They're my friends, but I didn't go there for them. That's what upsets me.

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    • I've tried. The first time, we were able to talk things out and get back to normal. But this time, he hasn't really been interested in this situation. I told him how I felt and all he said was "Oh".:. and then he said he call me after he got off of work, and I never got a call. I even texted him asking him about the call, and I still never got a reply. At this point, I'm fed up and confused as to what happened.

    • Well think in that situation you need to think if it's worth the hassle

  • He's being extremely passive right now in his actions and hoping maybe you'll pick up on them and let things be, by the sounds of it. Some guys are afraid to end relationships because they fear the confrontation that would follow and so they just let it go and hope you get the message. While this is certainly not the best way to go and definitely not what a girl deserves, it happens often!! I know it's frustrating waiting around for answers. You may not receive them though so for right now, try your best to accept it, and keep as busy as possible.
    The problem isn't really you in this situation, it's him! And his lack of communication and avoidancy says A LOT about character. Stop initiating contact, as this will just push him further away. I'm sorry you have to deal with such nonsense, I know how you're feeling :(

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    • I really appreciate your nice and honest answer! I have asked him many of times before if he wanted to be together, and he keeps saying that he does. I even left the floor open for him to tell me what's on his mind. Nothing :(

    • I went through something similar for a few months and the silence and avoidance I received completely took over my mind. I couldn't understand how someone can treat someone this way, when they supposedly care for you. It's not something we will ever understand though, so for you're own sanity it is best to let go and don't reach out, because reaching out and getting radio silence or vague answers to questions makes you feel worse than if you ignored them. I know it's not easy, there was many times I text just to see how it would go, but it filled me with anger not hearing back and then I started regretting it all together. These kind of people aren't thinkin of you or how you're feeling in this situation, they're only thinking of themselves and what makes it most easy for them. It's sad and disappointing, but there will come a time down the road where you'll slowly stop caring, realize your worth and that you deserve better, and accept that there was no closure. Much love to u!

    • Thank you for that. I mean, I love him. I really do. And we've known each other for what seems like forever, and I've always felt the same way about him. This is just heartbreaking. I went through I horrible relationship/break up with someone I was with for three years. I thought that this time around, things would be easier. I was wrong.

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