WHY can't I GET OVER HIM?

It's been over a year since we've ended and he's been over me after a month that we stopped talking but im still deeply inlove with him and hurts me so much that he has someone new... who seem worthy she's so beautiful better looking than me i guess, and i feel so miserable... why am i so attached we never even had sex or anything im waiting till marriage... but im so inlove with him still and can't move on... whats wrong with me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • "she's so beautiful better looking than me i guess"
    If you only guess you must be about equal beauty. Some guys dump for a choice. It's totally unfair but that's the reality.
    "and i feel so miserable... " Sorry to hear that. I understand. Well it's time to prove yourself and him that you're better off without him. It will be the case if you make sure it is. "why am i so attached we never even had sex or anything im waiting till marriage..." Yeah he dumped you because he wanted to use your body. Great job about not letting him touch you, you'd be even worse now. Keep that rule, it helps filtering hearts from pricks. "but im so inlove with him still and can't move on... " well apparently he was very much in love with your body but since he could not easily get it, he got another. Now he's happily f... ing someone else and has a great life. Which means you should too have a great life. "whats wrong with me? " Nothing! It's just painful as it's supposed to be! And yet you lost a player, not a potential husband. You lost nothing of value. So get up, and move on. Start taking care of your business, spend time doing something with your family, watch a movie, don't stay alone as loneliness kills after break ups. Yo time to get a hug, gather your strength and get up. You lost nothing of value. Your honor's intact. Turn towards the future and forge it. Stay a strong lady.

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    • I left him cause i found out about females he was sleeping with behind my back :'( even though he messed around on the dl with other women he treated me with respect :( and told me i was the only female he respected so he wasn't going to take advantage of me it made me think he loved me back and was whilling to drop other females for me but im so stupid and let my pride get in the way right when he decided to change his ways i changed up on him and ended what we had though he tried to tell me he cared :'( i feel so much guilt for not being patient on him if i didn't let pride get in between we could've been together by now :( or maybe im just so naive/delusional

    • "or maybe im just so naive/delusional " You are totally naive. I'll expalin why.
      "I left him cause i found out about females he was sleeping with behind my back" Here's an act of betrayal of low dishonourable men that can't stay true to their lady. I see a crying smiley. I woould not expect anything else. He hurt you. Unfairly. Disrespected you. Betrayed you. Backstabs are particularly painful when you're seriously and emotionally involved. But the thought of hurting you didn't stop him from doing it. You got used! You're the victim, alright, not him! "even though he messed around on the dl with other women he treated me with respect" Nah that's not what I call treating a S. O. with respect. "and told me i was the only female he respected" if he did respect you why did he disrespect you? "it made me think he loved me back" love gets proven with actions, deeds. Not empty, manipulative words. If he loved you he would have NEVER done that to you.

    • "im so stupid" No you're not. "and let my pride get in the way right when he decided to change his ways i changed up on him and ended what we had though he tried to tell me he cared" your pride guided you away from a horny, hurting, disrespectful and cynical player unworthy to be with you. In other words your pride served you better than you can admit until your realize who it was. He cared huh? Then why on earth did he do that to you, to your relationship? What he cared about is using you. "i feel so much guilt for not being patient on him" Don't. just DON'T. You owe him NOTHING after what he did to you, to those other women he used! "if i didn't let pride get in between we could've been together by now" Yes and you'd have been betrayed again, again, and again, until you finally undertand he's merely taking advantage of your heart to get to your body. He can't be trusted! Get support from your family and friends. You'll have to move on from this one. Don't blame yourself. Be strong.

What Guys Said 2

  • I know the feelings I've been there but your feelings will eventually fade. Just keep your mind occupied with thing alike self improvement.

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    • I try so hard but the thoughts of him invade my mind i feel in deep depression and isolated myself its so hard for me to go out cause im scared of seeing him with her

    • I honestly prefer that he messes around with a whole bunch of females thay have him settle down with another woman that's not me

    • It may feel like crap now but this feeling will go away. I spent months freaking out every time I went near an area I knew I might spot an ex but you can't live like that. Don't waste your energy on someone else who isn't good for you

  • If you are still deeply in love with him then it's surprising how your relationship ended. It's strange. I think it's because your feelings, emotions are still strong and deep just like it was before you ended your relationship

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    • It ended because he was messing with other females on the dl or at least that's what his step niece aka my 2nd cousin told me she said i was only his side chick so i ended everything

What Girls Said 1

  • I read once that it takes half the length of the actual relationship to fully get over someone. For me personally I feel that's been a fairly good estimate. However if it's been at least a year and depending on the involvement, I would be a bit concerned if you were not somewhat over him.

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    • We started in 2013 ended 2015

    • Sept. 5 to be exact :/ in a few weeks it would be a whole year

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