Is he being an asshole or should I take this to heart?

I dated a guy for eight months and he would never have sex with me because he could never get hard. He wouldn't get hard for me ever so we only had sex like twice. He said it was my fault because I wasn't good enough at sex and he could finish for every other girl of his past but me, let alone get hard. (I'm a fit and cute girl by the way, and a lot of people said I was out of his league). It's been a while since we broke up and I found out he was cheating on me with an overweight, not very attractive girl. I asked him about it and he was just like she's sooo pretty and she's way better at sex than you. What the fuck? I don't know what to think. Every other guy I've slept with performs fine no matter what I should do... What should I think about this?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The chance that what he said being true is 10 times smaller than the chance that he simply had some kind of erectile dysfunction and was hiding it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Look, no matter about the other woman (and I won't comment on her because it's typical for us to exaggerate or insult the other girl. Se could be hot for all we know).
    He was cheating. He wasn't able to perform for you because he'd already gotten it. It is never your fault he couldn't get hard. And how can you be bad at sex if you never have the damn sex.

    He's a cheating, lying jerk who tried to make you feel bad because he only wanted sex from you in the first place and didn't get it because he was trying to have sex with everyone else.

    He also probably had erectile issues in general and was taking his impotent related anger out on you

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    • I don't think that's why he couldn't perform for me. I mean, no straight guy I've ever dealt with couldn't have sex one time. I'd say he had like half sex with me twice (lasted 20 secs), and this is in eight months. We couldn't have sex because he couldn't even get hard for me. And somehow that was my fault

    • And not everyone can perform again straight away. If he's had sex with her and then comes home to you, it's highly likely that is why he couldn't get it up. There's also just him being a dick in the first place.
      He was probably with this woman since the start of your relationship.

      It's not your fault. Even if it's stress and someone can't get hard a few times, or their on medications, or even if they're simply not attracted to you! It's still not your fault. If he felt ZERO for you, and you absolutely couldn't get him hard, it's still his fault for then staying with you and not going and being with someone else.

      You still didn't deserve what he said.

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What Guys Said 5

  • It means you didn't get the right person to have sex with.
    Sex is supposed to be based on love, not only for fucking.
    Once the love doesn't exist you can't acquire a lot from your boyfriend.
    Since he is cheating, you can imagine how important are you for him.

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  • This is weird. We really need pics of all peoples involved.

    The problem comes with the term "overweight", women have varying degrees of what that means.

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  • It sounds like you're having a hard time dealing with rejection.

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  • some guys like them thick and some guys like them stick

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What Girls Said 1

  • He's blaming you because he's embarrassed, so I wouldn't take it to heart.

    Rather than admit he has the problem performing, he's trying to lessen the humiliation and inferiority that he feels. Making you feel worthless and useless makes him feel less insecure about himself

    You've now seeem his true character. He's not a guy I would continue to date. I'd cut contact with him , because he's the sort of Person who'll lay blame on others, rather than take responsibility

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