My ex can't support herself. How long should she stay with me?

So I married for the second time. I have two daughters. One from my previous marriage and one from my second. I was so in love when I married the second time but then a few months after she did the unexpected. She rejected my first daughter. So I did all I could to change things but in the end after almost 2years she still expected me to choose her over my daughter. I finally gave up and asked for a divorce. So now she has had a change of Heart and wants us to stay together, and wants to include my daughter. The problem now is me. I am not In love with her anymore. I feel jaded and even awkward when she tries to show me affection. We have not even slept in the same room or bed in over 6 months. We don't hug or hold Hands. And when she tries to kiss me I feel so awkward. I am very kind and caring towards her. I still support financially and emotionally. I'm her best friend and I am always trying to encourage her to pursue her dreams And I care so very much about her. But she can't support herself financially or our daughter. I told her not to worry. That she can stay as long as she needs to in my home and it will continue to support her. My question is what is a reasonable amount of time? We can't live like this forever. Let me know what you all think and any other Insight you may have with the rest of my situation. Thank you very much for your time


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Most Helpful Girl

  • honestly, she doesn't really sound like a person who deserves help at all.
    does she have family or anything? friends?
    that is not an ideal situation for ur kids... so do what u need to do. tough love. but ur kids well being does come first. she is grown, ur children r not

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    • Well she does have friends close by. They offer her to come with them but I told her of course she could do whatever she wanted but not with our daughter. Our daughter has her own room, own things and all the support from my family here. I told her I can't let her take her to be staying at a friends couch and no money to support the baby. I told her I am open to her taking our daughter under shared custody but only if she has her own place and can provide our daughter her own room and her own things. And of course I am Willing to help her with the cost of this but I just can't bare the whole burden of maintaining two households by myself.

    • U shouldn't have to... she needs to wake up ans smell the coffee...

Most Helpful Guy

  • within 4 months or maybe 6 she should be able to find something

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What Girls Said 2

  • Well you've done your good deed. Should only be long enough that she can provide herself. If it comes to it you should just take custody of your daughter as she's your priority. Not her

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  • Have a couple questions if you don't mind. Why can't she support herself and your daughter? Does she work/what does she do for a living?

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    • Well she is from Southeast Asia - so she hasn't really wanted to introduce her self to our work force yet. She has a bacclaurette degree in business management. I encourage her to start her own business. Not to sound stereotypical but she is interested in starting a nail salon or an eatery of some sort. I told her I will front
      The money for school for her to get her certification for the salon and to help start it. I only asked for one condition... For her to help me raise some of the money and take initiative in starting it. I don't want to do it all and just hand it over, which I think she may be expecting it. I want her to make a life here because our daughter deserves to have her mom in her life and if she returns home they will be worlds away from each other. Which, I don't want to see my daughter grow up without a mother. Anyway, this is why.

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