My boyfriend is having mixed feelings?

We were on a break for awhile cause his thinking has been very messed up and a girl walked into his life that he had strong feelings for awhile ago. I just found out that on the break, he hooked up with her. He says he feels really bad about it but he is also saying that because i frustrated him so much I made him do it.

I am not trying to make excuses for him, but he does not handle stress very well. He chooses to push it aside and not deal with it. On the other hand, he would not give me answers as to what I was doing wrong and it annoyed him so much it pushed him over the edge.

I still think he has feelings for me because he still talks to me and stuff, but he also has feelings for the other girl. He's the kind of person who thinks that one wrong thing in a relationship means there's no getting better. He has told me, his mom, and all of his family that he is going to marry me. He also got me a promise ring and his mom said he wouldn't just do that if he didn't mean it. He gets very caught up on what happened and doesn't believe things can be fixed. But again, his feelings for me I feel like are still there. What do I do?

Updates:
Also he usually does end up realizing what he did when he's cooled down and what not, it's just the way he works and his mom said he does this a lot and he'll be good again in two weeks. Do you think he'll realize what he lost?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • lol I'm not going to even read you're entire story, I stopped at him saying you made him do it. Unless you put a gun to his head, threatened to cut his dick off, threatened his pets or family you didn't make him do shit. He's trying to justify his decision by blaming you which more than likely, like most girls these days are stupid enough to accept that as your fault. Fuck if I'd stay around waiting to find out if I'm second best or what, move on. Let him figure out his dick as far as where it wants to be, he doesn't love you. If he did a girl who he had feelings for before wouldn't tear into your relationship that easy. Stop trying to cover up for him, trying to make him look good by saying he got you a promise ring, saying he is going to marry you. If he was serious he would have never banged the other girl.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • ... But he also has feelings for the other girl.
    This is Telling me and it Should be Telling you as well, @togemn, that he is not Ready Nor Raring to be Two birds of a Feather who Stick... Totally Together.
    He has found Someone else, along with still Loving you, this is very True, but it's now this "Triangle Threesome," Where you are Way at the top, looking down, Side to Side, at the Both of them too.
    Give this Time and Space. You appear the Kind of girl who Won't just Vanish into thin air. But expect some Big Blows in the Future, with you being this Monkey in the Middle, with Him being Confused. Especially if you Enable him to Have his Cake and Eat it Two, with her and You.
    His intentions seem so Wonderful and like a Fairy Tale, but Nothing Can Come together until this Chapter has Closed, where you are His Only Only... Cinderella.
    He is Right when he Says this, where things Can't be Fixed, Not unless he Makes an Effort with his One Team Mate... Hopefully this is You.
    Good luck. xx

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • forget about him, he's not mature enough to have a relationship and you deserve better than that.

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    • stop trying to defend him just brcause you love him. He's an immature selfish guy and you can keep telling yourself that he's really great but his faults will ruin any relationship he gets into. You deserve someone who loves you for you and is loyal to you. I know how sacry and hurtful break ups are (my girlfriend of a year dumped me a week ago), but trust me, you're better off without him.

What Girls Said 3

  • I think this... quit worrying about what he is going to do. You respect yourself enough to set healthy boundaries with him. You know he hooked up with someone else, which you have known now, but go No contact on him. It won't be easy. Tell him YOU need your space. No phone calls, no texts no social media, no nothing for a time period set by you. Tell him that you want to think about it and explore your options... see what he does then... it will work

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  • Look if you guys needed "a break" then you guys shouldn't be together. If the guy really wanted to commit to you then a break shouldn't be necessary. My boyfriend an I have never had a break and we have been together for 13 months. He and I are unlikely to ever have a break. That's a commitment to a relationship. I'm young and a break should be more common at my age than at yours, just ask him if he wants her or you get him to choose because you shouldn't tolerate cheating even if it's on a "break"

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  • Tell him to suck a dick? You'd be doing his ass a favor by making the decision for him lol... Seriously, can people REALLY be this silly?

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