Why is it so easy for a guy to move on?

My ex and I dated for 2 years (throughout highschool). He was very serious about the relstionship and did talk about the future. I was leaving for university and he was always so sure about long distance. But then he changed his mind and we broke up mutually. He was very upset about it and broke down the day before saying he can't lose me. We decided we still want to be friends though.

2 weeks after the breakup he came to meet me while I was with my friends. One month later I called him up to ask him why he changed his mind so suddenly. He said he has been thinking about it and after talking to his sister he realised. He took the decision after thinking for just two days. On the phone he was so casual about it and told me he has moved on quite a bit. Said he goes out a lot and so it was easier for him and I am taking a gap year so I am still stuck.

When I asked about whether he was open to a relationship in the future he suddenly changed his mind as said no way, because its "weird". He was so normal about it. He said Im sorry but its the truth I would not at all be open to it and that hurt so much. He said its not like we aren't going to like and be with other people. He even went on and confessed he does find some girl attractive.

"I know it seems fast but this is who I am, why can't we just be friends, etc etc". I can't believe he is already onto the next girl in 4 weeks. We were togther for over 2 years. He is so different all of a sudden and this is hurting me so much. I feel like the breakup happened for other reasons.

I dont know how to deal with this I feel so betrayed because he was talking about me like what we had was so casual and was so insensitive to how I would feel. He then told me he would call back and never did. What do I do.. He is SO DIFFERENT suddenly and I just can't stop hurting.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The break up and the hurt it caused him, probably forced him to adapt to the situation. He probably looked for the quickest and easiest way out of that by finding someone else to be with.

    Like burning yourself on a flame, you instinctively pull away from what's causing the pain. The pain in breakups have caused people to pull away as quickly as possible.

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    • But that's a rebound isn't it? I mean, isn't it clear he has 0 feelings and his life is much better with me not in it. Why else would he be so shut about the future

    • It could be a rebound or he really has moved on. When I let go of someone I loved, I moved on fairly quickly. It took less than a year to lose all feelings for her. I haven't contacted her in over 5 years now.
      Obviously this guy moved on even quicker than I did, but some do...

Most Helpful Girl

  • he is not worth it, just find a better person and make him see that you are the best thing he never kept

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What Guys Said 2

  • I doubt he moved on that fast. Sounds more like he's better and bottling it up... I mean this is the guy you said broke down when you broke up.

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    • The day before we broke up he did break down on the phone saying he can't lose me and it'll take him at least sux months to move on but look at him

    • When we met in person to break up he was doing his best to keep things normal but then left because I was sort of quiet and said he's losing control. I just don't understand how he can move on so fast.

  • Guys just don't really want to be friends after and they only seem to move on faster if they can get a girlfriend right away to fill that void and take their mind off of you

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    • He kept insisting on still being friends and just by liking another girl how can you get rid of feelings you've had for two years. Has he really moved on because.. he changed and seemed so casual about it all. I don't know how to stop feeling bad I feel so betrayed

    • Yeah I know, it sucks, maybe he is just hiding it well. Same thing happened to me , my ex wife got immediately married as soon as the divorce papers were finalized and we had been married 17 years

What Girls Said 0

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