Is he worth it? So hurt right now?

I dated my ex boyfriend for 2 years. 3 days ago we argued on the phone about him getting a job. He needs to constantly be reminded to go out and look for a job, he lives w/ his aunt rn. He doesn't want to work. I don't know what he wants to do with his life. He got a scholarship from a college &didn't even care. He said work is more important right now but hasn't tried goin out to look for a job. I'm hurt because I've been there for him and he just ended up leaving me. He says I'm too controlling cause I don't want him talking to girls or going out w/ his friends. I have trust issues w/ him ever since I caught him flirting w/ his lady friends when we first started dating & it got worst over time. One time when he actually had a job & was working he messaged me saying he was going to bring me food after work & so I waited on him. After he got out he turned his phone off on me after I tried calling him like 20 times. I then found out he was with a "lady friend" at the movies. The same "lady friend" he had nudes of like 2 years ago but still- any girlfriend would be mad right? Or am I tripping? Anyways after all of that happened I was still there for him, put up w/ his shit, his laziness, and his lies. Now he's telling me he's tired of my craziness & that I don't let him go out with friends, talk to whoever he wants and he's done with it. He doesn't want to talk to me anymore and wants nothing to do with me. I understand he's stressed because he lost his mom years ago, doesn't have anywhere to live, but that's his fault for being irresponsible, he's A GROWN MAN he's 20yrs old. Should I move on? I'm turning 20 in February , starting a new job, going to college for the first time this semester as well, and am trying to save up for a car & trying to move out. I have family problems & my ex was always there for me when I had no where to go that's why it's so hard to let go. Why is he being distant &wants nothing to do with me? How do you deal w/ depression after a break up?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Move on. Your guy has serious problems. Maybe he's depressed or whatever, but he's not able to be a partner to anyone right now. You could spend your whole life waiting for this to change. He's not your responsibility. There's no reason for you to sign up for years of unhappiness.

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What Girls Said 2

  • He can live his life how he chooses and you have to respect that. It's not your right to demand or dictate what he should do, and it's hard to accept people don't meet our expectations but you have to accept it so you can let go. You've acknowledged you have trust issues and if he only fuels your distrust then he's no good for you. You have to acknowledge that if you don't like him as he is and you don't like the choices he makes then you don't really like him because you want him to be a different kind of person. He doesn't want to be involved with you anymore and this is a good time for you to take the space and time you need to reflect on your own issues and why you feel the need to change him. Respect his wishes, leave him be and focus on yourself.

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  • gurl he is a loser. You deserve better! Just think about the great future ahead of you👍🏽 leave him in 2016 sis you deserve better!!!

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