How long should I wait for my ex to contact me?

I saw my ex at a NYE party. We stayed up til 8am together, he kissed me and said he's still in love with me, always has been, would settle down with me, he's connected to my soul etc. Neither of us were fucked up. He tried for a year after we broke up to get in touch with me so we could talk again, but I ignored him til I saw him the other night. Before he left on NYE, he said he will find a way to message me because he has to see me again, and also said he's going to write me a love letter in a few weeks.

I haven't heard from him though. It's been two days since I saw him. How long should i wait until I assume he's just not going to contact me at all? Why would he say all that stuff and insist on seeing me again if he doesn't want to see me? Could he just be waiting a few days so he doesn't seem desperate, or to maybe test to see if i care and message him at all?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He was probably a little inebriated, all the same, or you would have heard from him before 2 days.

    He may well be testing you to see if you try to contact him...

    You ignored his messages for a year or more... I think you had good reason.

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    • He wasn't, we were up til 8am so if he was it would have worn off by then, and we left the party around 2am, he didn't even drink much and acted normal. You think he would have talked to me by now if he cared? Or do you think he would be thinking of what to say/do? In the past he has written me long paragraph-like things to try to contact me.. And Ididn't ignore every message.. Only the last one he sent me, then he stopped messaging me after that.

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    • He's been thinking and composing his messages carefully, right? It could take him a couple of days to say what he wants to say if he's not a literary type of guy.

    • Thanks for the MHO, Helpha. Hope you make the right decision here.

Most Helpful Girl

  • just be positive if he really meant what he said he will find a way. love is patience. and i really wish he true to what he said, and if you are really meant to be with each other destiny will find its way just be positive

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What Guys Said 3

  • Maybe he hasn't found that way to message you yet.

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    • Before he left he asked how and said he has to see me again. I told him I will unblock him on facebook, which I did last night, then he also has my email, which he emailed MANY messages to me the first year we broke up to beg for me back, so he knows how to be persistent and find little ways to talk to me.

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    • Why do you think he'd do that after everything he said?

    • Because he's your ex and there's a reason why he's your ex.

  • I'd wait about 5 minutes.

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  • 2099.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Give it a few more days. Based on that info, I say he calls.

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    • do you think he would have messaged me by now if he truly cares/meant what he said tho?

    • Not neccesarily. Many times guys think they need to play the three day rule or five day rule or whatever that rule is.

  • How about you reach out to him?

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    • Because our relationship is complicated and there are many circumstances where he hurt me where I don't think he deserves for me to fight for him right now. He promised he's changed over the years of me not knowing him and he knows that if he wants in he's gotta fight for it.

    • Maybe he's just nervous and trying to figure out the perfect thing to say.

  • Never wait for an ex

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