Why did she disappear from my life?



Hello,

I began dating a girl (that I dated back in high school 15 years ago) in September 2016, we met up as friends and we caught up on what we've both been doing the last 15 years, she was single parent and I'm also single father, we connected and began dating, for several months things went very well, and she confessed that she was in love with me and wanted a future with me, also she discussed maybe wanting another child in few years time. We agreed that we have same common interests and goals in life however we had a small disagreement on text in regards to how suddenly the relationship was overwhelming for her and I smiled, and touched her to often and she decided that she wanted to break up with me.. I didn't push or chase her I explained my feelings and told her to give me a call if she changes her mind, we went no contact for two weeks but she followed me on Facebook and viewed my snapchat story, suddenly I noticed that she decided to block me on WhatsApp, snapchat and Facebook, I waited two days and text her from my phone telling her I was feeling disappointed that she had blocked me completely from her life and that I hope some day soon she'll change her mind. I never received I reply and now 4 weeks have gone by and still radio silence.
My question is why would she just completely block me from her life when I've done nothing wrong but she confessed that she was in love with me?

I also fell in love with her and was happy in the relationship.


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What Girls Said 2

  • sorry to hear this, thats kinda sad. well for me did she open up about her past like if she is divorce or she still have a contact with her husband/boyfriend? or they still see each other because of her kiddo? well for me base on what you post here. i think she is afraid to fall again and to hurt again and she decided to need a break then she think about it and she decided to blocked you, but its kinda unfair like she just blocked you just like that with out a formal goodbye or something. i think yeah her feelings might be confused and she is afraid to try again. why don't you visit her?

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    • Thank you for your kind words. Yes she opened up to me about how damaged she is due to ex partners in her relationships, and how unwanted she felt over the years, I discussed the issues with her and listened to her sad experiences, on a brighter note we had some amazing dates, fun, and great conversations about the present and future. We was so happy the fact after 15 years we were reunited into a relationship :) I showed her great times and she confessed she was in love with me however she text one evening telling me she was feeling overwhelmed, upon asking her why she told me that I smiled, touched and kissed her too often (even though we only had contact once to twice per week) not long after she finished me and confessed she needed space (which I gave her) eventually this lead to being blocked on social media.

      I would love to visit her however I'm afraid I'll only look like a stalker or something if I just turned up lol. I do truly love this woman.

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    • Yeah for example

      A common nick name for a man's girlfriend in Liverpool would sometimes be said as (I'm meeting my bird at 9pm)

      From another city ( I'm meeting my lass at 9pm)

      So imagine this ( mate I'm meeting my bird for 9 bells at the boozer, we're gonna get a scran, so I'll say Ta-rah for now and see you tomorrow) πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      I personally wouldn't talk like this as this kind of talk in a whole sentence would be from a (scally-wag) maybe some person from a council estate..

      But the above is examples of our cities unique slang ha.

    • really? meeting my bird? hahahaha dang thats really funny.
      lass is ok but my bird hahahaha it is to funny
      omg hahahaha if say that here in USA they will just laugh lol
      pretty unique sometimes i really don't get it i need to say
      pardon please hahahaha, hey i DM

  • i think she got scared. i think especially being a single has a lot of pressure and kind of security that can be offered would make her feel more safe in the relationship. i don't how she became single but sounds like she's been through devastating heartbreak. if she adds to your happiness and you care about her happiness then show her the man that you can be and go after her.

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    • single mom*

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    • i understand but life is short. i see you are 31 and i just recently came into my 30s and i realized why not got for things you want? right now she is not yours so the outcome would be the same if she still didn't want to be with you but at least when we do these things we can look back and say yea we tried our best and it could not have gone any other way. and i can tell you are in a lot of pain and this is something you're thinking a lot about. why else would you be posting this on GAG? if anything do it for yourself then, for closure. even though it's painful, i think moving on will be faster if the outcome doesn't turn out to what you want.

    • I noticed she was on instagram, I recently sent her a message, just telling her that I value our friendship and relationship.
      You're right I've nothing to lose now, so if I'm blocked on instagram by her then it's a full out block.
      It's been almost 7 weeks since the breakup and 4 weeks of that has been radio silence.

What Guys Said 1

  • You know, it's impossible for anyone to know what happened there. Only she knows for sure and quite frankly, it's very possible that you know too if you really thought about it. I think it's a huge red flag if you guys dated for "several months" and yet you have no idea why she would just up and do this. It tells me that you didn't know remotely as well as you thought you did. I'm not saying that's your fault -- it could very well be that she was holding back things the whole time.

    Anyway, I'm sorry this happened to you. People are complicated and life can be really complex. Maybe there was something going on in her life that she just couldn't share with you but it's really hard to imagine. But still... most things in life aren't so mysterious so I really do think that it's most likely the case that either you know or should know what happened.

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