Friends with an EX boyfriend?

So last night my ex boyfriend (we broke up almost 3 months ago) called me & wanted to tell me that he's talking to someone else & that they've been talking for a month. We've had a roller coaster of emotions going on these last few months, with him having a heart attack, from us flirting & kissing at one point. But last night we agreed on our terms of being friends & he wanted to set boundaries. I've been wanting to set boundaries since he kissed me, but ig now this new girl changed his mind. I plan on moving on regardless, but how can I strictly be friends w/ him but not be TOO available to him. She looks exactly like his other ex that he was extremely in love with & she cheated on him... & I feel like he's only talking to her because she's been giving him space (something I sucked at) & because deep down he still has feelings for his other ex that hasn't been resolved yet. I haven't been contacting him & I don't want to just flat out ignore him. I need help with finding a balance! I want to tell him to slow it down some. Of course I would love to have him back with me BUT he's talking to a girl that looks like she could be his other ex girlfriends sister! I wanna give advice but I feel like he'll just think I'm jealous. I just want him to be happy and I honestly think he hasn't faced those feelings he had about their breakup.

Other than that, I do want him as a friend in my life, because we've been friends since we were 14 & we're 21 now. I also don't want to be his back up chick in case him & the new girl doesn't work out. So how do I avoid that while trying to have a friendship with him. The only thing I can think of is keeping my distance & just being nice when he contacts me, w/out being available all the time. Cause when him & his ex broke up, he had me there to help him through it. But now that we're not together, he has this other girl.. but she looks like his ex and I feel like he can't let her go. I wish I didn't care so much. HELP?


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  • Don't be friends with your ex, I'm sure you can find other people to befriend and it's just silly trying to force some kind of friendship just because the relationship failed or doing it only with the hopes that if you remain "friends" your ex will change their mind. If you actually want to move on then accept the breakup and don't see your ex.

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