He told me he can't be lovey dovey because of his past relationships?

I've been dating this guy for 7 months now. In the beginning he was very attentive and complimentary. He really made me feel special. However, for the past few months he has been awful at texting me back, sometimes takes anywhere up to 12 hours. He doesn't compliment me often, or say sweet things to me. I can literally count the amount of times he has said something nice to me. He doesn't try and show me off, and has told me "I used to be lovey dovey with my ex's, but I got fucked over. So now I'm trying to be mature about this one and make it last"

but thats is hurting me. I don't feel special and I don't feel like a priority to him.

I've talked to him about it, and told him how I feel loved with compliments and affection. And he's told me "I know I can do better and I should"

maybe he just doesn't care about me. EVen though he said "I think I might even love you". But he probably just said that because I was upset.


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  • I was in a long distance relationship and my ex did the very same thing. I tried asking him to message me more and he would make excuses on how he should do better, but actually he barely tried. You are not a priority to him and using his exes is not a valid excuse.

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  • I can understand how you feel to a degree. My boyfriend isn't always super affectionate in ways most people are in a relationship, and I know its because of his exes, but he still will make an effort to give me compliments and such.
    I think its good you've already talked to him about it. Its always good to bring up any issues you feel like is causing tension.
    If you don't notice any changes after a while, bring it up again. I'm sure it'll take a while for him to essentially open up again to feel more comfortable to give out compliments and such.
    (And you can be mature in a relationship and still be "lovey dovey" with your partner. Maybe that's a point to possibly bring up.)

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