This is long please help? Abusive boyfriend or another boy that doesn't really care?

If anyone can give me advice I'd really appreciate my boyfriend has issues he has bipolar disorder and anger disorder. He has been extremely abused and saw his father hurt his mom. As I don't think it's his fault he still will hit me every week then get gets super nice and I think he's changed 2 weeks tops he's screaming at me in public and saying mean things and doesn't take his medication. A week ago he punched me in the leg and bruised me. My mom loves him but doesn't know this side. He will be homeless if I kick him out the house and I don't want to do that. Right now he's acting so nice and he's taking his medication again but literally a week ago he hit me. I'm not perfect and had my fits where he says things in front of his friends making fun of me and treating me like shit and I lost it and would slap him. This happened a year ago but I changed. I told him I'd change for us and I did. I never touch him but he still touches me. I then get a message from a guy in California that I find very attractive and we start swapping pictures and flirting and he wants me to fly out there and meet him. He's 100% real and he only wants me to come out there to have sex. I love sex and I know it's wrong since I have a boyfriend. But my boyfriend had times where he was messaging girls and grabbing and touching girls at the club. I feel like a horrible human being but I want to meet up with this man so bad. It's like I'm distracting myself what the real issue is. My boyfriend. Everyone is gonna say end it but I LOVE HIM. And I know he loves me and really doesn't mean to. He said he's gonna take care of himself but takes his medication and won't get into therapy. I want to leave him but he lives with me and pays my bills and WILL kill himself if I kick him out. I just want to meet this other guy because it's my dream to live in California yet I don't know I might just be a booty call which I probably am but in my mind I think that I should meet him because my gut is telling me to.


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What Guys Said 1

  • It is a very difficult situation you find yourself in, and I'm afraid there are no easy answers. Abusive relationships rarely work out well, and more often lead to disaster. In all honesty, I would suggest you distance yourself from him, but I know that sounds uncaring. The trouble is, a person who has no respect for himself cannot properly respect others, and if he already uses violence or abusive language with you, it will only get worse, unless he seeks a lot more proffesional help. It is not a relationship he needs. Based on this your other matter is something only you can decide. But whatever your choice, you should not feel guilty. You are not the one who is truly able to help him. Be careful though not to get yourself in a dangerous position with him. Remember, there are plenty of decent people in the world who will listen to you, and help if they can. Good luck.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Just leave. He seems very narcissistic. 9/10 times a man threatens to kill themselves if you leave is bullshit. They just want you to feel guilty. Say "Adios loser."

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