Is he using me or does he care?

My ex and I reconnected and it didn't work out. Last night I told him I am done being romantically involved with him and he said he was sorry for what he's done and begged me to spend one week with him after he gets back from a mission trip in two weeks. He ended up kissing me and we slept together and insisted on seeing me when he gets back, repeating multiple times he wants to spend July 4 with me and have at least one week together.

I told him I don't think that will happen and am sticking to it.

His behavior has been very unacceptable. He's said extremely hurtful stuff to me, disrespected me, and acted in ways that make me feel ignored and I prioritized. I don't know what to think. I know he loves me and always comes back for me but I don't know why he acts this way then comes around when I tell him I'm done with him.

What should I think? He hasn't texted me this week or since last night.


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What Guys Said 3

  • Another female pointed out the term "mysoganist". you might look at that definition and see if it fits... if you see the behaviors.

    Either way, it isn't healthy... he always comes back to you with a ring, commitment, commitment to respect and love you and want the best for you? Nope... comes back for sex... the drugs... right? That's a connection, I get it, but it isn't a solid foundation.

    He probably comes back because he's bonded, gets comfort, drugs, human connection and leaving feels lonely. He doesn't want to face or deal with his bad feelings... probably about his past.. but that is what he needs to do. In a way, you are enabling him.. you are his pharmacist passing out sex drugs when he comes calling. Send him to get therapy.

    relationships are more messy than I make this, there are probably two sides and more dimensions, but that is a starter...

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  • he's just using you for sex

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    • Not really, he says he wants to save sex for marriage and stop banging anyone it's one of our biggest arguments so I don't think that's it

    • ah I thought you meant sex when you said you slept with each other.

    • Yeah we did sleep with each other. He WANTS to have sex but knows he shouldn't religiously basically. I don't get it but he does still want me

  • Ignore him or simply say you are done with hin. Hope im helpful xD

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