Cheating on your girlfriend?

Is it possible for a guy to cheat on his girlfriend several times and then get back with her and be faithful? Or is a cheater always a cheater, especially if its on the same girl? Is there something missing in that particular girl that makes a guy cheat on her, like she's not enough and he needs more and its permanently like that? Or can he be with her again and suddenly be faithful?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think so yes. I think things can change.

    I view cheating though, not so much the fault of the cheater, but more the fault of the person being cheated on. Why would they cheat on you in the first place?

    I've never cheated by the way, but I've been with a girl that plain outright cheated on her boyfriend. And I feel bad, but he treated her like crap. Gave her a good reason to do so, If he would just listen to her, she'd have no reason to get closer to me, because I simply would listen to the problems she had in her life. He wouldn't do that. So who's fault is it ultimately?

    • That is a very specific situation. Cheating comes in all shapes and colors. Some women cheat on their husbands because they only want him for the security he provides. Meanwhile.. they get off doing dirty wrong things with other people behind their backs because its a huge turn on. THe danger.. the fear of getting caught.. the thrill... It's an intoxicating chemical cocktail that's hard to resist once you've got it pumping through your blood.

    • It is still the cheaters fault. If I was in a relationship with a jerk, I would talk ro him first about his behavior and if it doesn't work, I would dump him and cheating would not be necessary.

    • I don't think wrong-doing can be made right with this kind of explanation, especially with this kind of scenerio where devil got sent to be with devil. We should try to help giving a moral suggestion under the assumption that there is one good heart in the story that needs to be healed.

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What Guys Said 23

  • Stay as far away from him as you can, or don't ever dare complain when it happens again. Brace yourself and move on.

  • A: he needs to want not to cheat

    B: the relationship needs to be different. How it was is not working.

    C: part of B ... they probably need better communication. If he can't tell her when he's feeling whatever the trigger to cheat was, they can't work together to deal with it.

  • it can happen and has but its rare . it takes both working on the relationship to make it work . if one slacks off or stops trying that's were the problems come in.

  • Yes it is possible for a guy to cheat on his girlfriend and then be faithful. In fact the vast majority of long term relationships have had one, or both, people cheat at some point.

    The issue is really how it's perceived within the relationship. What was the reason for doing it? How did he feel after it? Who did he cheat with?

    These are all questions you would need honest answers to before deciding whether or not it's worth putting the effort in to the relationship. Unfortunately all cheating can be avoided if you are both open and honest with each other in the first place.

    If he has cheated because you're not providing something for him, for men it's usually the feeling that you want him, then he should have talked about this with you before hand and you would be obliged to respond to his feelings. If you can make him feel like you want him, then he wouldn't go looking elsewhere. The same applies for women who are lacking something at home, if they tell their man, he is obliged to respond. Assuming they do the problem is solved before it becomes an irreversible one.

  • Several times is a bit rough? One time, yeah that can be forgiven but doing it again is completely just not cool. While I do think it is possible for him to be faithful again I don't think it's good to be with that kind of guy. Even if he is faithful. I think in most cases where guys cheat is either because they're drunk or they're tempted by other girls who couldn't give a f*** about whether he's in a relationship. Guys like that are not worth it.

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What Girls Said 13

  • Ok, there is so much to address here, but #1 is 'Is there something missing in that particular girl'

    ... Cheating is not the partner's fault. If it is merely a dating relationship, there is no excuse for being unfaithful. If he needs something that is not being provided in the relationship, he either needs to leave or talk to his girlfriend about the issue. Cheating 'because she's not enough' is complete bullsh*t.

    #2 is the repeat offender. No, it's not possible. Whether it's tomorrow, next month, next year, or five years from now (though I'm betting on the faster horses in this race), he's going to cheat. It's not because his girlfriend isn't fulfilling his needs. It's because he's a habitual cheater.

    #3 Cheating rule: If he's cheated twice, there's not salvaging the relationship. End of story, no more questions. Once is a mistake he can regret. Twice is intentional and disrespectful beyond all forgiveness. A man that continually cheats thinks little of the women he's attached to and considers her simply something for his own convenience, not a person on her own merit.

    To quote Einstein, 'The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results.' He's not going to suddenly change.

    Of course, if you want the Rom-com version: Oh, yeah, he'll totally have some life-changing experience this time that will change him forever! *throws glitter in the air*

  • personally I wouldn't ever get back with someone who only cheated once. So I defo wouldn't get back with someone who cheats on me over and over. What's more and I am sorry to say this, but it sounds like he can't stop himself, and you'll never be sure, which means there is no trust and a relationship can't work without trust. If this girlfriend of his turned her back and tell him no way, my guess he'd do one of two things, either, he'll be right damn annoyed and wished he'd never strayed cause he's lost the best thing in his life, or he'll fade out because he never really cared in the first place. Harsh truth, sorry.

  • I don't think I could ever forgive a cheater, there are no mistakes, only actions we regrettably have to take credit for.

    Maybe, just maybe I could forgive him for one discrepancy, but even that would take years.

    Several times? Not a chance, I would never be able to trust him, never feel secure and I would be so disgusted with him that all attraction would be lost completely.

  • I don't think there's one straight answer to this. Different guys cheat for different reasons. If a man cheats because of an inadequacy he feels about himself, he will probably continue to cheat until he resolves his own internal issues. If he cheats because he feels trapped in the relationship, he may stop once he and his girlfriend have talked about their relationship and he feels more secure with his decision to stay. There's really no telling.

  • ... Anything's possible, just highly unlikely.

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