Why did my Girlfriend break up with me why is she doing this?..

My Girlfriend recently got out of a 2 years relationship with her ex.and she said she loved him I've known her for about 2 years and been going out about 1 month.recently she said we need break up for awile so she could get her feelings for her ex to go away which I understand but I kinda feel like the rebound guy I don't know what to do she says she LOVES ME SO MUCH and it seems like she did for the time we where together, I can tell for a fact taht she really likes me but idk. I just don't know anymore PLEASE HELP! I love her with all my heart.


Most Helpful Guy

  • sometimes women will jump to another guy right after a breakup. we all know this as the rebound.

    not only does she feel a new sence of loneliness after being used to being with somebody, but she still has all these emotions running through her that she she wants/needs to attach to somebody. and that somebody just so happend to be you.

    as far as her needing space that is also perfectly natural. she may have dome to a point to where she finally realized on the emotional level that you are not him. its not that you are a bad guy or worth any less, her emotional side just realized that you were not what she was actually looking for AT THAT TIME.

    by the way this was written it sounds like you two left on good terms. once she gets over him she may come back one day and decide to continue something with you assuming you at least put a good impression on her. or a FB or a FWB who knows what benefits could surface.

    but on that same note, there are a million fish in the sea brother. you might, but I don't wait for anybody.


What Girls Said 7

  • 1. Maybe her "feelings" for you (that she loves you, etc.) may be her feelings for her ex directed to you.

    2. It could be that she truly does love you, and she's been realizing it since she's known you for so long, but a long relationship like that DOES take a while to get over. If she loves you, and wants a break up, she'll come back to you.

    3. I think ifyou love her, you should honestly talk to her. And tell her how you feel. No one will know for sure, except for her. Just talk to her. Tell her you're confused, and tell her you want the honest truth.

  • I believe she looking out for you. I mean by breaking up with you due to her feelings for her ex. I believe she was respecting you and your feelings. It seems that her feeligns for her ex are way more then she realized when you two started dating. In order to be in a relationship and feel the right feelings for someone you can not have an ex on your mind. So, she did the right, noble thing breaking up wiht you in order to sort her feelings out.
    I do not think she did this to hurt you, and I"m sure she really does love you like she says she does.
    Give her her space, let her work this out, and if she really did have feelings for you she will come back to her. Just be there for her as a friends.As hard as that may sound that really what she needs right now.Not a boyfriend. A FREIND

  • i think that everything she told you is true. she probably really has feelings for you. but, her feelings for her ex must have been very strong, and maybe she's just unsure about going into that kind of a relationship again, especially soon. keep telling her ur here for her, but make sure you don't get annoying. I'm sorry.

  • Hey I can understand that. I had exactly the same thing, got out of a 2-3 year relationship, started dating a guy, had to break up with him. But the reasons are always different. This time, I just didn't actually love the guy, so well obviously have to break up. But maybe she wasn't ready for a relationship. Maybe she has a lot of feelings for her ex (well she says she loved him, so I'm guessing so!) so I mean, I think give her time to heal. And say you'll be there for her as a friend. Because she needs friends the most at this time, not a bf. Because breaking off a really long relationship can be really confusing sometimes.

  • It sounds like me. I just recently got out of a two year relationship and almost immediantly went to another guy. I was uneasy about it, but we both loved each other. We're not officially dating since I don't want him to seem like the rebound and so no one thinks I

    m a slut cause I'm not. I don't want him to have the rebound guy stamp on his forehead.

    So perhaps she broke it up so she dosn't seem like a nasty person going from one guy to another, and so you don't get stamped as the rebound guy. Or she still loves the ex and trying to figure out her feelings untill getting back together with you.

    Don't worry, she'll come back. She just needs to sort out her feelings and needs to listen to her heart for a while. Going from one guy to another is rough on the emotions. She'll either realize that she really does love you, or decide she is not ready for another guy yet.

    Be a good friend at the moment, let her know she always has someone to go to if she needs someone.

  • if you met her right after she broke up with he ex, it may be that you are her rebound, let her hav e her break and decide whether or not she wants to be with you. as hard as it is and you have strong feelings for, let her decide and in the end it will all work out.

  • This is an easy way to let you down and let her try to get bak with her ex - if she wanted to get over her ex as she says and let those feelings go that she has for him she would STAY with you to keep herself occupied and find the things she adores in you to make a future with you. Sounds harsh but I think you should move on - if she comes back whole heartedly then give it a go but I think she is playing your field and ur just a sucker for love :)


What Guys Said 9

  • If I had to guess it's because you didn't have sex. I mean come on, you've been going out for a month already! Pull the frakkin' trigger already. She just got out of a long term relationship and needs some action to help get over her ex. Since you weren't providing that for her she's going to move on to some other guys for a while.

  • I suggest you back away from her.

    Give her space and time to sort out what she wants.

    If she likes you, she'll come back to you. You can't force it. Don't expect her to come back to you. however. Move on with your life, but part on good terms if you want a possibility of dating her again.

  • erm.check the time slot between her breakup and you getting together with her.if its rather short I think its a rebound.girls say that all the time when they're in a relationship.kinda makes guys wonder if they really mean it.cuz when ur in love.ur blind to everything else

  • It's only been a month man. Get over it. I've gone out with 2 seperate girls I dated over 5 years. One of which is probably going to be leaving me soon. So yeah your problem isn't really so severe.

    Heres one thing you gotta know, a lot of girls are tricksters and manipulators. For one thing they GET A NEW Boyfriend to forget the old one. Not leave their new one to forget the old one use your head man. Usually in a situation like this, the guy (you) is being used to strike up jealousy or interest from the EX (which as you said she's still got feelings for.)

    If you really wanna wow a girl who digs jealousy & conflict like that, you simply need to beat up her ex boyfriend showing strong passion for her. (alot of women get hot for that.)

  • Im sorry dude but you are the rebound and 90% of rebounds don't last. She loves that you are not him and that's it. Have you guys had sex yet if so then maybe it is real if not in all likely hood she did it to make the old boyfriend jealous. Sorry man get away from that relationship its not good for you at all.

    • Yep, except the whole sex part. Even if they had sex, he's rebound as she's not thinking clearly.

      Basically, think of her as a drunk chick for the next 1-2 months or however long it takes her to get over her ex.

  • I just went thru the same thing...Met her a month ago...saw her ALMOST everyday for 2 weeks. Her ex of 2 years had kicked her out of the house about 9 months ago. She said she still had feelings for him, but didn't want him back. Anyway, She kissed me the first nite we out. But over the two weeks, whenever the kissing would start to get heavy, she'd say we have to stop, "because it will lead to something bad."? I couldn't figure out what was going on. I spent the nite at her place twice, the first time on the sofa, the second time in her bed...she even made references to sex, saying she was attracted to me...but she said she knew herself, and if we had sex, it'd all be over? I knew she was still getting over her broken heart, so I told her I was patient, she was worth, and that I could wait until I knew she was ready. One nite, she said..."don't take this the wrong way, but do you even want to get married and have kids?" I explained I don't think about it much, but if it happens, it happens. Then, the night before christmas eve, she took me to her parents house for dinner...wouldn't that mean she was really into me? I thought so. Anyway, after dinner we went to a bar with several members of her family to sing Karaoke. Afterwards, she said she was hungry, so her and I went to get a bite...Now I don't know exactly how the conversation went next, but it somehow led to me asking about whether or not her ex was still texting her for booty calls (the nite I met her she had shown me a text msg from him stating exactly that "booty call?") The look on her face made me shudder...hesitantly I asked "You're not still sleeping with him,...are you?...Please tell me you're not still f***ing him...I mean PLEASE tell me you haven't f***ed him since we started seeing each other?!?!?!?! She couldn't answer the question. I was dumbfounded/confused/hurt/shocked/angry/...etc. I stood to leave...she grabbed my hand and pulled me back into the booth...I said "What? What do you want? What are you doing? Why am I even here with you? What the f*** am I doing here? Don't you know...can't you tell...that I am falling for you...hard? I didn't want to tell you because it is still too soon, and I didn't want to freak you out...but now it doesn't matter...Leah I'm falling in love with you." She started to cry. I grabbed her and just held her tight in my arms, saying "Oh sweetheart, please don't...I'm sorry...I didn't mean to make you cry." Back at her house, and I slept one more evening carressing her. In the morning,..she took me home...I spoke to the friend who introduced us...he blew a fuse...he started yelling about her being a slut and that I should not speak to her at all...and if she calls I should tell her that I am thru...all day I just stewed in disbelief...that eve, I got drunk and we started a text argument...haven't heard from her since--GIRLS...IS SHE THRU? OR CAN I GET HER BACK? Though I can't believe what she did...I still Love Her

  • just give her a week or two and then have a serious talk with her about yal

  • sounds like your a rebound to me dude. she probably need someone to comfort her and it happen that you are around and now she is confused cos her feeling toward her ex and u.
    best thing to do is leave her ALONE. don't even bother to comfort her, your only going to hurt ourself.