How to break up long distance?
Kind of a bummer topic I know and pretty cliche but I'd appreciate input from girls and guys.
I've been in a long distance relationship for about almost two years now ever since my boyfriends family moved south. We're thousands of miles apart and frankly it's pretty amazing we made it this long. But lately we've started to drift apart...I can definitely tell and feel a difference though I'm not really sure he's noticed.
I'm just not satisfied and happy with us anymore...he's SO far away and our conversations (well really our whole relationship) went from happy and intimate and fun and something to look forward to to strained and dull and impersonal. We don't talk nearly as much and when we do it's either really disappointing or trivial. I've been thinking of breaking up for a while now; we've always been so close though (we were good friends before we got into a relationship) and I know that this is still going to feel out of the blue for him and regardless of how downhill our relationship has gone I don't ever want to hurt him.
So how do I do it? We can't do it face to face. Call? Text? Email/Internet?
I know text/internet seem kind of cold but IDK. We've been pretty distant lately. I'd almost feel weird asking him to call.
Any ideas on how to do it? And how to spare him as much hurt as possible?
What's Your Opinion?
Most Helpful Opinion
if you haven't been chatting and a Skype break up isn't possible send an email saying you want to break up and explaining why. Just explain about the distance or he may think you have cheated or are interested in someone else and be hurt by that.
What Guys Said 3
He no doubt feels much the same way, and also hesitates to break up because of yur feelings.
I'd just ask him, 'Do you think we should stop pretending? Nothing to be angry about, but it's just too long to be apart and together at the same time.'
He'll almost certainly say he's been thinking the same way
Write him an email and explain how you feel, but tell him that you'll talk with him about it if he wants to call you. Make it clear that the distance and being apart is just too much, and both of you are wasting your lives and missing out by not being able to be physically close to someone. It will hurt, but at least he'll know WHY you are breaking up, and it won't be because you don't like him or anything.
The only thing is, you'll have to stand your ground, and not let him try to talk you out of it, which he may well try to do.
Good luck, and be smarter in the future and don't let yourself get into LDRs, because this is almost always how they end.
What Girls Said 4
I was in a long distance relationship 2 years ago, it was horrible but I'm glad you lasted this long! anyways I completely understand what you're going through and how you feel. I broke up with my ex because I knew with out asking him, he was cheating on me but it just didn't feel the same and I wasn't happy regardless how hard I tried to be happy, which you shouldn't do because you tend to become hurt. I say before you do that move, talk to him and ask what's been up with him. If he begins to just deny everything then deny the relationship because that's how it feels. I say call him and if you have Facebook where you can use the Skype there then that would be better that way if you or he's says something, there won't be any misunderstandings... but I say internet if that's what suits you better. goodluck and tell me how it goes girl!
I would say send him a long sweet I can't deal with the distance anymore email. And then text him and ask him to read the email please.
You have to explain the reasons why you are ending this and how the only reason is the distance and perhaps if he was there things would have still been great between you two but you are exhausted and tired of feeling lonely...
Ask him if he has any other solution other than this to make him feel like its not him its only thr distance maybe he can move back or something I don't know..
Long distance suck... But it can work sometimes if its worth it =)
well you should always try to be as honest as possible with your feelings about things that are going on and how you feel. So if you feel the need to break up, then do so... I think maybe Skype is the best way, because you will be able to see each other when doing so.
just tell how you feel and get your feelings out there...
i get that you don't want to hurt him, but sometimes you need time alone to jjust think and figure out what you want!