I have a dilema with 2 girls and I really need some advice?

please read before answering. and I would like honest sincere answers.

girl "A"

we have been chatting online for awhile now an I feel we have a real connection. we really look forward to our conversations together. we Skype from time to time. and I feel very comfortable talking to her. we share secrets and stuff... problem is we have never met...there is a 13hour drive separating us... I mean we planned on meeting and such but the best case scenario is we see each other a couple of times a year...

girl "B"

i had a crush on her about 5 years ago.. we use to talk and stuff and thought we might of had something but she had a boyfriend and we never did anything... then she moved away...well I got an email from her that she moved back and asked me out for drinks...

i am really torn on what to do... I am faithful and honest and I talked ti girl "A" about it... she supports me and wants me to be happy no matter what even if its not with her...but I feel so bad for hurting her and if it was the other way around I would feel the same as her... I would put her happiness above mine...

so why do I feel like a monster cause I know I hurt girl "A" even though she says its ok...

im going to meet up with girl "B" to see what happens...it could be a " friend " thing or something more... I will never know unless I go...


Most Helpful Guy

  • Go for girl B. You have not put any time in with girl A (in person)..plus she's much too far away for something long term to work out. Sure...it could happen, but the odds are not in your favor. It's not against the law to talk to more than one girl at a time.Girl A is nothing but a cyber girl...nothing more at this point. I'm willing to bet she's talking or dating other guys. Go meet girl B and see how things go. You got incoming form girl B already, which is a sign of high interest level...go for it!

    • I don't understand why you have a down arrow I like your answer

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    • thanks Libramoon, and tswayd.

    • @ update. If you don't think you'll get another date with girl B...then kiss her at the end. If you're sure you'll get a second date... wait to kiss her then. Good luck!

What Girls Said 8

  • Eh, it's only natural that you would feel a little bit bad. But maybe she recognizes that the idea of you two together isn't really plausible and won't be hurt at all! And who knows if you would even be compatible in person... You two could just have a beautiful friendship.

    It sounds to me like "girl B" is a more logical choice given the history and distance convenience.

  • You feel that way because you really care about her, which is a good thing. Just feel out the situation, you don't know if girl B is going to be your soul mate she could be completely different.

  • I think that if you're not going to get something on the books with girl "A" then you need to move on. Having a virtual relationship or even a "vacation relationship" where you're just getting to see each other every few months is not very desirable.

    Also, lets say you guys do meet up in a few months, and continue to meet up every few months from that point... there's still a long ways to go before anything significant can happen to where you technically need to be loyal to girl "A." Being faithful and honest is a really great quality to have, but being loyal to something that's non-existent is not very smart.

    I'd say give girl "B" a chance and go get drinks with her. She may just be looking for friends instead of looking for a relationship with you... you never know!

  • I met my current boyfriend online (we are now living together). I was testing the waters with other guys, being young and all, but I had feelings for him even before we met face-to-face. It was after we met that I threw all other options out the door because I had found my fire, my reason, the person I love more than life itself. I am glad I didn't continue test driving other guys because I would have missed out GREATLY if I had turned the one I am with down.

    By the way, I lived in Canada, he lived in Germany, distance doesn't matter once you're in love. It may hurt to be apart, but when it's the right person, you'd wait forever.

  • You care about girl A and that's very sweet. I would still suggest going out with girl B for drinks, keep it casual and just get to know her again.

  • ok really I'd usually say girl B because it's got a batter chance in the now, but what gets me is no where do you mention you care if you hurt girl B . you know why? because Ur in love wIthaca girl A. If I wassup you I'd meet girl A as soon as you could see if she's as great in person as she's when you two talk if she is maybe she's the one.I'm with Annie on this one..sometimes you can meet the love of your life online I met my husband on match.com and we are two very good looking busy people who lived on the opposite side of the uunited states. Things can happen of you want it bad enough.

    • just to clairify I don't want to hurt any one...i still don't know if its a "friend" thing or something more...

    • Understandable...I do think going to meet girl B is smart...but meeting girl A is just as smart. Why don't you meet both before you decide on either. Weird though that you really seem hurt hurting girl A by just meeting up with a girl who could just be a friend. Tells me you really care about girl A...maybe your falling for her

  • while I would say girl B. how are you sure that girl A isn't the one? I understand that you don't have a relationship with her and it's virtual but did you guys like make a promise to focus on each other?

    Girl be is there and available but do you have a connection with her? o for the one that makes you happy

  • You should go with girl B...even if girl A is great many long distance relationships don't work...my only thing is if You feel like a monster for doing something that makes you happy either girl A has made you feel guilty in some way or you really like her. I personally would go with B because you stand a better chance at it working out I'm the long run possibly ... but with that being said if letting girl A go is making you feel that bad maybe there is a reason.

    • How did everything go?

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    • only advice be honest be real!

    • I am... thank you :)

What Guys Said 5

  • go for whoever is hotter

  • girl b doesn't sound definite yet, why don't you hang on to both of them for a bit and if girl b seems more like a real possibility than go back on deciding? Hope that makes sense for all of you.

  • B ... Hands down

  • I wish I have two girls in my life at the same time : (