How can you not get emotionally attached after having sex with someone? I know guys don't usually have this problem.. but girls how?

Question basically says it all.

I have been talking with this guy since February and everything has been good. He has been taking me on dates and talking to me daily.

I spent Saturday night with him and we ended up having sex. (we had sex back in college which was 4 years ago but he told me he wanted to take it slow this time which we did) I feel more emotionally connected with him now.

I feel myself kind of freaking out today because I haven't heard from him yet. He did text me first last night on his own. How can I help myself not get so attached and crazy feeling? I am good at hiding it from him but it is killing me as I am waiting to hear from him today. UGH! I hate this whole dating thing.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Your question has a simple answer...don't sleep around! I know people don't want to hear this but actually be in love with someone before you give yourself to them.

    This is what happens when people just sleep around with no commitment or real feelings. Some one gets hurt or someone gets attached (like it should be. If I'm sticking my penis in a girl I want to feel attached to her before we even think of sex) and the other person doesn't. It's nothing but issues.

    Just look up friends with benefits on this site and see all the drama and heartbreak it causes. Respect yourself and find a guy that will respect you. Then you will be attached and when you have sex it will be that much more amazing and you don't need to worry about him never calling again...well there's a much better chance

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What Guys Said 3

  • Why dont you just text him first?

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    • I feel like it should be him contacting me first the majority of the time so I don't come off as "clingy or annoying". He just sent me a snapchat a little bit ago after I posted this question but still.

  • acutally boys look fr sex girls look boys for care and a tickle of manliness..

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  • I honestly don't know if this can be learned behaviour. Certainly it seems to come instinctively to guys.

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What Girls Said 3

  • I cried my eyes out after my first experience without feelings but after that, I managed to be more distant. I don't think I could have handle a real sex friends but sex never meant falling for the guy to me.

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  • Dont have sex with guys you have history or emotional ties with.

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    • Well I knew eventually I would end up having sex with him since we were taking things slower this time around. I just feel that my feelings got that much stronger now that I have been intimate with him. It may be because I don't sleep with just anyone. I have to have that connection with them in order for me to do that.

    • Well then you it's probably best you dont sleep with someone unless you're committed to each other equally (when he's your boyfriend), otherwise this will always be the outcome.

  • i just dont have sex with people i dont have a emotional serious relationship with, simple

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